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I should say off the bat that I've cheated in most relationships, but only after it became clear to me that the relationship was going nowhere. I'm not proud of this, but I mention it because some people can change: I've finally met the right guy for me and I would NEVER EVER think of cheating on him, the thought makes me sick to my stomach. Not that I deserved it, but I am fairly certain that no boyfriend has cheated on me. I think this is because I have a pretty good sense of what to look for--it's not that hard to predict whether a guy is likely to cheat, though of course you can never be sure and every new BF deserves a clean slate.

Here are the risk factors as I see them:

1. Does he ever look at other girls while you're together? Guys that don't are HIGHLY unlikely to cheat. If he does, it doesn't necessarily mean that he'll cheat, but it is a sign that one girl is not enough to hold his attention.

2. Ask him if he's ever cheated in the past, and look not just for his answer but for any signs that he's lying (looking away, looking up to the left, touching his face, stuttering). If he says yes, that's a bad sign but not definite proof. If he seems to be honest when he says no, very good sign.

3. Is he secretive about his phone or computer? Does he move to hide the screen or shield your view if you look at what he's doing on the computer? Does he let you use your phone or leave it around where you could look through it, and does he always answer it when it rings when you're around? If he lets it go to voicemail, does he answer you honestly if you ask who called?

4. Do his friends have GFs, or are most of them players? Does he bring you around to his different environments--to meet work friends, guy friends, family? If he keeps you isolated it could be a sign that he's seeing other women and doesn't want anyone he knows to inadvertantly mention any other women.

5. Does your intuition tell you that he's keeping anything from you, or being less than completely open and honest? If your gut tells you he's up to no good, he probably is.

Good luck everyone--there really are great guys out there and all the women here deserve one that will be completely loyal and devoted to her.
[QUOTE=Snails]I should say off the bat that I've cheated in most relationships, but only after it became clear to me that the relationship was going nowhere. I'm not proud of this, but I mention it because some people can change: I've finally met the right guy for me and I would NEVER EVER think of cheating on him, the thought makes me sick to my stomach. Not that I deserved it, but I am fairly certain that no boyfriend has cheated on me. I think this is because I have a pretty good sense of what to look for--it's not that hard to predict whether a guy is likely to cheat, though of course you can never be sure and every new BF deserves a clean slate.

Here are the risk factors as I see them:

1. Does he ever look at other girls while you're together? Guys that don't are HIGHLY unlikely to cheat. If he does, it doesn't necessarily mean that he'll cheat, but it is a sign that one girl is not enough to hold his attention.
[B]
2. Ask him if he's ever cheated in the past, and look not just for his answer but for any signs that he's lying (looking away, looking up to the left, touching his face, stuttering). If he says yes, that's a bad sign but not definite proof. If he seems to be honest when he says no, very good sign.[/B]

3. Is he secretive about his phone or computer? Does he move to hide the screen or shield your view if you look at what he's doing on the computer? Does he let you use your phone or leave it around where you could look through it, and does he always answer it when it rings when you're around? If he lets it go to voicemail, does he answer you honestly if you ask who called?

4. Do his friends have GFs, or are most of them players? Does he bring you around to his different environments--to meet work friends, guy friends, family? If he keeps you isolated it could be a sign that he's seeing other women and doesn't want anyone he knows to inadvertantly mention any other women.

5. Does your intuition tell you that he's keeping anything from you, or being less than completely open and honest? If your gut tells you he's up to no good, he probably is.

Good luck everyone--there really are great guys out there and all the women here deserve one that will be completely loyal and devoted to her.[/QUOTE]


Good advice snails......I highlighted # 2 though because I dont agree with asking about the past like that unless he says something. He may have cheated and if he did he may not want to share it because he wants to move on. Many people are ashamed of thier past. He may have cheated but he could be one that doesn't anymore. Its really hard to tell but I suggest not asking unless brought up by him. If she cant trust him enough then maybe its best that she finds someone who she can trust.





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