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Hello! I had a nice time at the party, laughing and whatnot, but there was an underlying sadness the whole time. I felt like a third wheel cause there were all couples there (most with kids) and then, well just me. And then well meaning people kept asking all night "where's your partner?". Thankfully my brother in law and sister would chime in for me and just say that it's a touchy subject and we shouldn't talk about it - he's just not here. When I woke up this morning, when all the drinking and laughing was done, it was like... okay, back to reality. My sister didn't talk much about it to me, but my brother in law did when I went to the shops with him. He is about 34 now, and told me that he had gone through that phase as well. He said that it is the classic behaviour for someone who is seeing someone else. I said I didn't think so, and he asked if it was only wishful thinking. It makes me wonder though. Now all day I have been analysing all of the signs etc to see if any of it makes sense. I think that I would be more devastated if that was the case. I know that I have been wrong before, but I just don't have that gut instinct that it is the truth. I don't know. I know that it shouldn't matter anyway, but I guess I still live in hope a little. And to top it all off, I get home and there is a card from my friend who got married last year telling me how happy she was and that she is expecting a baby. Oh, I am so happy for her, but it makes me feel sorry for myself even more!!! :D

I am so proud of you on your achievement of 3 weeks with no contact Elated. It hasn't even been a week for me yet :rolleyes: . And to hear that you have come out a little of your bad run of days is great news. I'm glad that you relate to my feelings of "how did I get here". It really is bizaare. I too thought that I had it all figured out, but I guess it makes you realise that nothing is really a certainty. My family are reacting the same. But my mum goes through phases of asking me questions, and then nothing for a while. I know that she means well. I don't think she knows how to handle it though. I think my dad was her first serious boyfriend and they married after about 6 months, so she probably doesn't relate to how it feels. The one thing that no one has asked me though is whether it is over or not. It's like they just expect that it's a phase and eventually we will get together. Or maybe no one wants to upset me. I have been a bit crabby with everyone at home so I wouldn't blame them.

So all I can say is that I am still in my bad run of days. Hopefully I'll pull out of it soon like you Elated. I haven't tried to contact him for a while, and I know that it will be better for me, but I always find the first couple of weeks the hardest. At least you made it through that tough period. I find myself trying to pull out of thoughts of him too if I start for too long. Even if I try and read a book I get distracted of thinking of him and realise I've read a couple of pages and don't know what the hell went on!! So I've been watching movies to try and take my mind off it. The worst thing though is when something reminds me of him, and it is seriously like someone has kicked me with huge force in the stomach. And my heart sinks. I know that you know what I mean Elated...

Thanks for listening as always! Elated, hope your good days start to get longer and longer!!! It really is like watching a little butterfly emerge!!! I can't wait for the day when you come here and tell me that you have met the guy of your dreams... even if I'm still wallowing I will be ecstatic for you!!! ;)

PS. I bought some of those books that you were talking about before to try and pull myself out of it ("He's just not that into you" and various other inspirational books... hope they help!!)





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