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[QUOTE=SophiaM]Oh, it must be so incredibly frustrating. Unfortunately, I think the best thing would be to tell your ex's to stop calling altogether. They have to face the decision of either making up their mind or losing you girls altogether. I'm not saying it's easy, but ultimately prolonging the agony is probably more painful and frustrating, as you know. I made a mistake of being "friends' with my ex fiancee for almost a year after we broke up---what an exercise in futility and bathing in masochism that was. I do not advise anyone to do it.[/QUOTE]

I agree..I haven't tried to contact my ex,wow, today is 4 weeks. You know things are getting better when you forget to count how many days it has been!!! :) That just cheered me up..

Anyway..once I didn't contact him anymore it was really hard for awhile, but I don't go through the agony anymore. I accepted the fact that I had to move on and I'm kind of glad hes not contacting me because it really would be much harder. I couldn't handle that. He did that for a couple weeks and I thought I was going insane so I guess I made the decision for him....and it was a good one because he never came running back. So, I think its best to try and not have any contact...SophiaM I'm not sure how you did that for a year? I'm only friends with one of my ex's..actually the one who cheated on me but it was at least 6 months afterwards and we're very casual friends.

I'm not sure how you cut off contact but I do think it is best. Its the easiest way to start letting your heart heal. Otherwise you'll be "stuck" in this moment of "what if" thinking...
YAAY!!!! Happy 4 weeks Elated!!! I'm sooooo proud of you!!!

I know that it's best to cut off contact. And I have tried (probably not hard enough). But he keeps pulling me back. I think that once I ask for no contact, and ask him to take his phone out of my name (for financial reasons), then I will feel better and he will know that I am serious. As I told him yesterday, this is just ridiculous.

Sophia, I tried to be friends with my ex of 5 years too. I didn't find it too bad, but then he moved along distance away so it's not like I had to see him. It also took me a while to be able to do that, but I prefer it that way rather than harbouring any ill feelings. I think it only holds you back. We slowly lost contact over the years, but I still speak to his sister every now and then. Hey Elated, you think you were forgotten about... my first ex moved a new girl in the day after we broke up (which was 6 years ago now), got engaged after a few weeks (I had waited 5 years) and now has 3 children. Talk about fast work huh? Now THAT'S what I call forgetting all about someone!!! :jester:

Well guys, I feel marginally better now. Yes I did get some sleep Elated... thank goodness. rd, I'm still frustrated to hear that there is no new news from you? What the hell is wrong with these people?

My New Years resolution... if I bring in the New Year without him, I'll end it without him too.





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