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[QUOTE]But the girl was very understanding. She was the one who kept calling him from time to time, and eventually when he was feeling emotionally better, they started dating and are now in a very committed relationship. Had she given up on him, she would not be with him now.[/QUOTE]

I think it's great that Sophia's friend continued to make her interest in this guy known ([B]way to go![/B] :D ), even though he may have seemed uninterested at the time. I [I]completely agree[/I] that there are so many circumstances and life situations that cause people to behave differently than they would like to, so you can't necessarily categorize someone's behavior based on a seeming "norm."
Take me, for example: I am interested in a former coworker of mine who suffers from depression and anxiety (which he shared with me early on). According to some other coworkers, and my own observations, it seemed like he was interested, too. So, I finally decided to give him a holiday card (in a discreet way, so as not to embarrass him). In the card that I gave to him, I wrote my email address and phone number. Now this was about one week before my scheduled layoff, so I had some time to follow up on it. At the time, I chose not to push it much at all. I did notice a change (though not dramatic) in his behavior towards me. He smiled at me more, and seemed to be a lot more attentive...though he also seemed a little more nervous.
On my last scheduled day of work, he had had some tooth surgery the day before, so he was not feeling well at all. I suggested that he go home so that he could recover and feel better--I told him that "we would miss him." He went along with my suggestion. He let our supervisor know of his plans, and walked out of the main area. He stepped out, and I walked with him to the entrance of the building where we were working. Before he left, he stood there, bashfully, seeming to be waiting for me to say something. I finally asked him if he had read my card. He said that he had, and said: "I really appreciate it." I told him that I meant it geniunely, and that I would like it if he called me or emailed me sometime. He said that he would, and then stood there for another minute or two. I was kinda being bashful (and feeling nervous), myself, so I wished him a Happy New Year, and walked into the Break Room.
About one week passed, and he didn't call or email me. I was feeling hurt and disappointed. Finally, I realized that I had given him the [U]wrong[/U] phone number. You see, I had just moved into my own apartment, and I was still familiarizing myself with everything. I felt horrible about that, and realized that may be why he hasn't contacted me, so I set about trying to find his email address online. Fortunately, I found it, and I emailed him with the one alternate email address, and told him I would send him my phone number in the next email (since I wasn't sure if this email address was even his). He sent me a reply back, thanking me for giving him the right email address, and told me that he would email me something longer a little bit later. Well, it has been nearly another week, and I still haven't recieved anything from him. I do know that he will be starting a new job at the company where we were working, so I figure that he's really absorbed with that. I have sent him an email, telling him what I have been up to, and gave him my correct phone number, hoping that he might follow in suit. I understand that he's anxious, nervous, and a little shy, so I haven't done anything more than that. I figure that he will call/email me in his own good time. Hopefully, it will be sooner than later ;) .
*laughs* I guess what I'm trying to say with my long-winded story is that you have to really understand a person in order to have a relationship with him/her. There is no recipe, guidelines, or anything else that you can follow that will ensure a good relationship. You just have to follow your heart (make yourself known to the person--feelings, etc.), and be understanding of where he/she is coming from. One of my many new mottos ( :p ): "Give love and understanding, and you will be loved and understood."

Colleen





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