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Relationship Health Message Board

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Oh I don't want to be the devil's advocate, but I can't help it. I would be more than a little concerned, seriously. I have been married for just over three years now and I am a reformed cheater. I can say that I never had a relationship where I didn't cheat at least once. I cheated on my current husband before we were married, but never ever since. I used to buddy around with guys, and I ended up fooling around with some of them, even when I was in serious relationships. Some of them had serious gf and it never stopped them. Since they only broke up because she moved, not because they were no longer in love, etc. that would make me wonder. I know I get anxious sometimes about my husband going out with the guys drinking and such because I used to be a cheater, I know how easy it can happen, even when you don't really mean it to. When we got married we both got rid of pretty much everything that had anything to do with our ex's (unfortunatly one of my ex's is in all of my grad photos, so I kept those, but I leave them in a box). My husband had a friend online from our city and she and her husband had an open marriage. It made me uncomfortable that she invited him out for drinks and when I told him my feelings he stopped speaking to her all together, he said he would never want to upset me by talking to some other woman. If you express your feelings honestly and maturly and he brushes you off I would either break it off or give him a serious ultimatum, stop contacting her or it's over. I hate ultimatums, but sometimes that is the only way to get his attention. If he won't give her up that should be a clear sign of who is more important in his life. I hope it works out, take care.

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