It appears you have not yet Signed Up with our community. To Sign Up for free, please click here....

Relationship Health Message Board

Relationship Health Board Index

Nini, yes, that's what happened. I said "ok, let's break up then" and he just said "ok great". But, I also told him before that .. that when I break up with him.. it's fake. So, he probably knew.

Basically, when we first met, it was amazing and he even told me I was "the one". Then, I started to be mean to him. This is because I realized that I had 4 years to go before I was done with my program and I told him I only had 1 year left.. so I wanted him to break up with me.. or something? Or, maybe I felt guilty. Either way.. he did not leave me. Then, I only had 2 years left.. and at that point.. he got fed up of my "attitude"... I would always complain and tell him I didn't want him to visit.. and I would not want to listen to him on the phone.. I was so used to being mean I got addicted to it. Anyway, around 2 yrs into this.. he finally got fedup and left me. I realized what I had and was depressed but I moved on as I figured he couldn't deal with the distance. THen, he ran after me once he found out I was meeting guys and advancing in other aspects of my life. Once we were back together, I was so happy to have a second chance. I was ALL OVER HIM. I would send him expensive gifts, e-mail him several times a day, ask him what he had for breakfast, basically stalk him.. And, I think it bored him or something because ironically he literally stopped calling me and it was always myself who called and who initiated topics of conversation. He tried to break up with me several times since.. and I just thought.. we already waited this long.. and maybe he just wants to break up because he's angry about how mean I used to be.. so I'd BEG him to stay with me.. and he'd give in. But, he's really not fully in, and hasn't been since the very beginning.

I know he did not cheat on me because he just kissed someone else.. and almost died out of guilt.. he called me the next day saying he didn't go to work and that he stayed home crying wondering about whether he shoudl tell me or not.. and then he decided it would be best to tell me.

So, he is being loyal and him staying with me is definitely keeping him back as he goes to restaurants alone and spends all of the holidays with me.

We see each other xmas, spring break, 2x during summer and 1x during fall.. so that's 5x a year. He pays for it all and brings me out.. but that doesn't say too much as he really can afford it. And, he uses all of his vacation on me such that he can't even go visit his friends from Chicago where he grew up.

Anyway.. he does sacrifice a lot and I'm drunk now missing him so much. I wish he was here he is so sweet and innocent. He never looks at girls when we're together and if I look bad (bad hairday, I have a zit etc..) he just tells me "guys don't care abotu that stuff" and doesn't make me feel like crap. When he was visiting he would meet me after my work everyday and bring me out to any restaurant I wanted. When I visited him, he worked 3 hour days so we could spend the day together.

THe only problem is.. when we're apart. He truly acts as if I'm joe from next door and we talk for 10 mins and he has some other "important" thing to do.. like play tennis with his friends?!?! And, I cry on the phone "But, we've spoken only a few mins a day the whole week.. cant' we have a real conversation?" and he just says "did you not hear me.. I'm BUSY.. I have to play TENNIS". Whatever.

Maybe he wants me to be more independent, to play hard to get. Or, maybe he's still hurt from the beginning and will never love me again. But, things have been mediocre and crappy like this for so long it's not fun and I have tried to improve it by tolerating it or threatening to breakup but it's just not improving.

I would hate to give up on us though as we've now done the long distance thing for 3+ years and I'm almost finished school. And, we do have a lot in common and there is potential. He just doesn't love me anymore and I don't know how to naturally/forcefully get him to care about me like he did in the beginning.

Sorry about the long post, but my bf won't listen to me and I"m drunk .. and my period is coming up so I feel like crap.


All times are GMT -7. The time now is 06:56 PM.

© 2020 MH Sub I, LLC dba Internet Brands. All rights reserved.
Do not copy or redistribute in any form!