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Hi Everyone, Well I do feel pretty good today even though I spent the weekend alone with my favorite boy my dog, I was suppose to go out with my friend but he ended up breaking up with his GF so he was a bit occupied. We had about 8"s of snow this weekend that kept me indoors too. The problem I'm dealing with now is that (our mutual friend) is telling all the other friends in the circle that my ex was cheating with this skank so now they're calling him and asking him what's going on with her then he calls me and say's now his friends don't even trust him and that it was bad enough me not trusting him now he has to deal with possibly losing friends that he's known forever. I swear this breakup is like the shot heard around the world. He know's its not my fault that our friend is talking about this and told me so but I know that he's not happy with me talking to him anymore. He told me to watch out for him and to not trust him. He has been playing us both and he is telling me one thing and then him another. My ex say's that he's trying to get him out of the picture so he can get closer to me and that's why he keeps telling us both to stop talking to each other. I told him that everyone is telling me to stop talking to you because we are broken up their isn't much left to say or do. I told him that this is my life now not ours and you made your choice to let me go now you have to do the actual letting go. I did good and ignored a few of his calls over the weekend, not all of them but I tried.
We're going out to dinner tomorrow night to exchange the last of the things we still have and to talk about a few things. He called me this morning and told me that he's been going out a lot because he just misses me and the dog too much when he's home. He even rearranged the living room so it doesn't look the same as when I was there. He said that he's still confused about a lot of things and still has a lot of thinking to do. When I talked to him yesterday morning he was suppose to be eating breakfast with "her" and her BF and another couple but he ended up sitting in the parking lot of the restaurant talking to me instead. He's real ticked about this friend of ours moving in on me and I think he's starting to really miss me I can tell by the way he talks or maybe its just jealousy (hey he asked for it). He said this morning that this is the longest we've ever gone without seeing each other (a week now) and that it doesn't feel right. He said the he's said a lot of things to me lately that he regrets and I said yeah well guys are just stupid and don't know any better and he said in a weird way yeah we really are stupid (meaning himself). I think he's got his tail between his legs. That doesn't mean that I think he wants me back I think it just means that it's finally hitting him what he lost. I sense a lot of sadness when I talk to him now and I know its not nice of me but I'm glad he's miserable he wanted it this way and I think part of him is regretting it. Part of me does think that I may be the girl on the back burner while she sits on the front but I'm still not sure god help him though if that's the case I will make certain that everyone knows what a louse he is. It will be interesting to see what happens now after we meet face to face, last time there was so much emotion all we could do was stare at each other and cry. Don't worry I don't have my hopes up for us getting back together I just wan't to see how he handles this it seems that he's having a harder time than me letting go.

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