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Relationship Health Message Board


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Well without making this the longest drama post in history..here it is short and sweet. Last July I started this intuition that my boyfriend was up to no good. We would break up over the stupidist thing and before I knew it, I would hear through the small town grapevine he had already moved on. It all seemed so quick. When we got back together in August, I felt something was not right. I started checking his cell phone bill. I HAD access to all this through his company files. SO I found numbers that were on there a lot and at odd hours of the night. I started calling them and getting girls answering or their voice mails. I wrote down a few names and really did nothing with it at first. By August I could no longer hold it in. So I asked him about one name specifically. He denied even knowing someone by that name. He was so believable she could have fooled a lie detector. Anyhow, with that said, I checked the following months bill which came the first week of Sept. I saw all the same numbers again, and late night (2:00am) calls on there to a girl on nights he was "out with the guys."

So I was going on Vacation with my roommate for labor day. While there, I get a phone call from one of his friends wives (whom I did not ever care for) telling me she has been sleeping with my boyfriend for 1 1/2 years. In disbelief, I got up, went outside and listened to everything. Her husband got on the phone very unhappy about it all, and began mentioning names of other girls he knew of. 75% of which were names I got from numbers on the phone bill.

SO I hang up....cry my eyes out and the next day, call some of the girls from the phone bill. 2 of the 5 talked to me and admitted they too had been with my man. All of them knew about me, but I did not know a think about them.

Four days later, I drive home. My boyfriend starts off denying EVERYTHING and then begins to confess day by day. Leaving out all details, we split for a few months. He is now back in my life and refuses to leave.
Says he is sorry for all the mistakes he has made and will never do it again. I want to belive him, but know I will never trust him. I am so confussed and hurt. I am so use to him. But at 30, do not want to be a victim anymore. :rolleyes:

What shoudl I do? Everytime I tell him how I feel (hurt and not trusting of him) he gets mad and goes off on a "but I love you and I am here to try" tangit. I have been to counseling and the gyno more times then I wish to have been. He has done nothing but one STD test. Why am I on more of a road to improvement then I believe he is?

Why am I wollowing in this?? It is the hardest thing ever.





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