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Relationship Health Message Board


Relationship Health Board Index


hmm...hard call....if you look both books up on amazon...compare the two and we'll decide...both look good...dr. Phil's looks more easy on my husband but i think the first one is better for me and you......

i'm out of town tomorrow and friday....won't be able to check my email but will check back as soon as i get home.

to the previous poster...believe me...i don't think anyone anticipates losing that "loving feeling." i know i thought i'd have it forever...as most of us think...many of us ARE lucky enough to have that...i look at my parents..married for 35 years (this year) and have never lost their spark...in fact they've probably got more of a spark now than they did when they were raising us! still hold hands everywhere, kiss and are affectionate with one another in front of others...it's such the dream of mine and i have such high expectations...i look at my husband's upbringing and he never had a real mom and dad situation. his mom was a single mother who pretty much raised him by herself...he had two guys throuhgout his entire life that were psuedo-father figures....nobody really cared to "father" him especially his own father. i think about what that did to him...he had no model to look up to and to strive for.....this could be a big part of his OWN problem and now we're both realizing it.

hmm.....love this board...really makes you (ME) think:)
[QUOTE=boxgirl73]hmm...hard call....if you look both books up on amazon...compare the two and we'll decide...both look good...dr. Phil's looks more easy on my husband but i think the first one is better for me and you......

i'm out of town tomorrow and friday....won't be able to check my email but will check back as soon as i get home.

.i look at my parents..married for 35 years (this year) and have never lost their spark...in fact they've probably got more of a spark now than they did when they were raising us! still hold hands everywhere, kiss and are affectionate with one another in front of others...it's such the dream of mine and i have such high expectations...i look at my husband's upbringing and he never had a real mom and dad situation. his mom was a single mother who pretty much raised him by herself...he had two guys throuhgout his entire life that were psuedo-father figures....nobody really cared to "father" him especially his own father. i think about what that did to him...he had no model to look up to and to strive for.....this could be a big part of his OWN problem and now we're both realizing it.


BOXGIRL,
YOU HIT THE ANSWER TO WHY THIS HAPPENED IN A NUTSHELL!!!!
Your parents consistently made it a priority to really love each other and show romantic love towards one another. It is no wonder why their relationship flourished. Your husband on the other hand, did not have an example. so he does not know how to be a romantic husband. BUT, he can learn as long as he has a willing heart.
I will look up the books on line as soon as I get a chance. I also have a novel to recommend. It is the sequel to the movie(and book) Notebook. I can not remember the name, but it is a wonderful story of a woman that loses her love for her husband, due to his lack of attention over the years. He finally realizes what he has done and goes about winning her love back. It is a beautiful story. Did you ever see the movie "Notebook." That is a beautiful story also, but i would recommend the sequel for you to read. I think the author is Nicholas Sparks. You do NOT need to read the "Notebook" to read the other book. The sequel is the story of one of the children from the couple in the first book that develps marital problems. Even though it is labeled a sequel it really is not in the true sense of the word.
It would be fun reading for you. It is not very long. Perhaps you can read it on your trip. Do not buy the Notebook, make sure you get the sequel. I'll try to find out the name of the book.
Have a good trip.
PS. Maybe you should start with Dr. Phil if it will be easier on your hubby. Remember, the goal is change.
Oh..that novel sounds perfect! wAs it a movie? Would love to watch it with my husband!

[QUOTE=BLUE EYED LADY][QUOTE=boxgirl73]hmm...hard call....if you look both books up on amazon...compare the two and we'll decide...both look good...dr. Phil's looks more easy on my husband but i think the first one is better for me and you......

i'm out of town tomorrow and friday....won't be able to check my email but will check back as soon as i get home.

.i look at my parents..married for 35 years (this year) and have never lost their spark...in fact they've probably got more of a spark now than they did when they were raising us! still hold hands everywhere, kiss and are affectionate with one another in front of others...it's such the dream of mine and i have such high expectations...i look at my husband's upbringing and he never had a real mom and dad situation. his mom was a single mother who pretty much raised him by herself...he had two guys throuhgout his entire life that were psuedo-father figures....nobody really cared to "father" him especially his own father. i think about what that did to him...he had no model to look up to and to strive for.....this could be a big part of his OWN problem and now we're both realizing it.


BOXGIRL,
YOU HIT THE ANSWER TO WHY THIS HAPPENED IN A NUTSHELL!!!!
Your parents consistently made it a priority to really love each other and show romantic love towards one another. It is no wonder why their relationship flourished. Your husband on the other hand, did not have an example. so he does not know how to be a romantic husband. BUT, he can learn as long as he has a willing heart.
I wil look up the books on line as soon as I get a chance. I also have a novel to recommend. It is the sequel to the movie(and book) Notebook. I can not remember the name, but it is a wonderful story of a woman that loses her love for her husband, due to his lack of attention over the years. He finally realizes what he has done and goes about winning her love back. It is a beautiful story. Did you ever see the movie notebook. That is a beautiful story also, but i would recommend the sequel for you to read. I think the author is Nicholas Sparks. You do NOT need to read the "Notebook" to read the other book. The sequel is the story of one of the children from the couple in the first book that develps marital problems. Even though it is labeled a sequel it really is not in the true sense of the word.
It would be fun reading for you. It is not very long. Perhaps you can read it on your trip. Do not buy the Notebook, make sure you get the sequel. I'll try to find out the name of the book.
Have a good trip.
PS. Maybe you should start with Dr. Phil if it will be easier on your hubby. Remember, the goal is change.[/QUOTE]





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