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Hi, I'm new here, but need to get some advice from people other than friends/family....sorry if this is a bit long, just need to get it off my chest

about 3 weeks ago my 7-year relationship ended mutually....I have been quite ready for the break for about a year, but was living overseas and thought it would be too messy to end things while in a foreign country....

Me and my ex b/f are the bestest friends....but there was no sexual attraction for a while...on my part anyway...he adores me and is extremely depressed about us breaking up....but it was his move....why? well, our relationship has been flawed since the start...before i knew him i was dating one of his friends and that went well then i met my exbf....but, apparently, my ex bf heard me and his friend...way back....sleeping together and could NEVER get it out of his head....

I only found out about this last year (6 years into the relationship)...anyway, so he brought up the fact that he couldn't ever marry because of this reason...SO, after he told me that I sport of switched off and became numb....


me and my exbf still hang out and do stuff that friends do (no sex) regularly....but this weekend i met a guy and have been on 2 dates with him and have been intimate with him....but i feel extremely guilty and panicky and i don't want to tell my ex bf.....i feel i have to though

the thing is, my ex bf has all this hope that one day he will get over his feelings about hearing me sleeping with his friend (before we were together) and is all hyped about getting his head sorted out so we can one day get back together...I have made it clear that this break up is permanent and we will not be getting back together...but he thinks he can change my mind....i love him so much as a best friend and want to be part of his life, but not be in a relationship...

should i be feeling bad about the new guy?
should i tell my ex bf that i have met somone else?

I've tried to convince him to go out and find a new girl...even just to date and have fun with but he gets angry when i suggest things like that and tells me he doesn't ever want another feel sick just thinking about this mess...should i cut off all contact with the exbf? help!!!


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