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Relationship Health Message Board


Relationship Health Board Index


heres my situation: i am 21 and was in a relationship for 4 yrs w/ my ex bf all through highschool and almost 2 yrs of college.it was great (trust, goals etc)but we realized we didnt really have alot in common and we argued alot so i ended it (this was may 2003) 2 wks later i hung out w/ a guy i met at college in january of 03. i knew he liked me and it was fun to hang out with him and i started seeing him AFTER i broke up w my bf. after about 5 mths hanging out w this guy we had sex adn i started having feelings for him even tho my ex bf was still begging me back. I liked this "change" I had only been w my ex bf before this so it was different adn i never thought i could have sex w someone i didnt love or was even going out w/. although he asked me out all the time and i said NO cuz i wanted to see how things went for us but we still had sex which i regret. this went on approx. may 03-to jan 04 then he transferred college adn i missed my ex bf again so we decided to try to work things out from jan til august 04. still talked to the other guy cuz we got along great but never did anythign sexual while trying to work out things w my ex bf. well the ex ended it in august cuz of "differences" and we still try adn remain friends. Im back with the other guy since about october adn i could not be happier. he is 23 adn about 500 miles away at college and we are closer than ever but moving slowly with the falling in love part! lol has told me he was falling recently adn always talks about our future and i really see one. we get along great and he is really sweet adn successful but [B][COLOR=Magenta]i dont know how to tell him i love him adn when? is it too soon or shoudl i count to when i first was w/ him adn if he is real about wanting to marry me but has not technically said "i love you" i do feel like i am falling in love w/out a doubt.[COLOR=Orange]or was i wrong to have sex w this guy before we were exclusive(altho he asked)?? [/COLOR] any similar situations? any advice would be appreciated. thanks xoxox[/B][/COLOR]
[QUOTE=staceymp]heres my situation: i am 21 and was in a relationship for 4 yrs w/ my ex bf all through highschool and almost 2 yrs of college.it was great (trust, goals etc)but we realized we didnt really have alot in common and we argued alot so i ended it (this was may 2003) 2 wks later i hung out w/ a guy i met at college in january of 03. i knew he liked me and it was fun to hang out with him and i started seeing him AFTER i broke up w my bf. after about 5 mths hanging out w this guy we had sex adn i started having feelings for him even tho my ex bf was still begging me back. I liked this "change" I had only been w my ex bf before this so it was different adn i never thought i could have sex w someone i didnt love or was even going out w/. although he asked me out all the time and i said NO cuz i wanted to see how things went for us but we still had sex which i regret. this went on approx. may 03-to jan 04 then he transferred college adn i missed my ex bf again so we decided to try to work things out from jan til august 04. still talked to the other guy cuz we got along great but never did anythign sexual while trying to work out things w my ex bf. well the ex ended it in august cuz of "differences" and we still try adn remain friends. Im back with the other guy since about october adn i could not be happier. he is 23 adn about 500 miles away at college and we are closer than ever but moving slowly with the falling in love part! lol has told me he was falling recently adn always talks about our future and i really see one. we get along great and he is really sweet adn successful but [B][COLOR=Magenta]i dont know how to tell him i love him adn when? is it too soon or shoudl i count to when i first was w/ him adn if he is real about wanting to marry me but has not technically said "i love you" i do feel like i am falling in love w/out a doubt.[COLOR=Orange]or was i wrong to have sex w this guy before we were exclusive(altho he asked)?? [/COLOR] any similar situations? any advice would be appreciated. thanks xoxox[/B][/COLOR][/QUOTE]


A lot of times, but not usually, a love relationship can develop from what initially started as a casual relationship. It looks like this is happening in your case. You have found a very mature man, by the way. Most men don't date women for long when the woman sleeps with them too soon. However, if I were you, don't say the "love word" until he says it first. It sounds like he has fallen in love with you to me, so you should hear it from him soon.

Just enjoy your new found love relationship and go with the flow...but let him say the words first. Good luck!





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