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Relationship Health Message Board


Relationship Health Board Index


Once again we were together and everything was great then departed and made plans to see each other. Then again, and then, one final visit together before the last long haul. We were as passionate as ever before we would have just over a month apart before being together for the entire summer again. To be fair, we had some conversations during this time about how we were going to change things up a bit when we were together again. I wasn't being myself around her friends and she wanted me to work on that.

I still had finals and grades to deal with, and to be honest they weren't looking good. My GPA had dropped in the year from a 3.65 to... well, I had to work my *** off to get a 3.0 and keep my scholarships. So thats what i had to do. Every day I spent studying, calculating, studying, calculating, taking only breathers to take with my girlfriend and look forward to the most anticipated relief of getting my last grades in and going home to see her. There were times where i was skeptical that i would be able to get even the 3.0 I needed, and she helped me through those times, telling me that it would be alright, even if i did not get the 3.0 and needed to stay the extra three weeks to take summer classes, it would be fine she'd still be there for me. Finals week began, and my very first test was a very important one. My average in the class was borderline C and i needed a good performance to swing my GPA. My grades in other classes came and they were less than impressive. Luckily, my dedication in the last weeks of class earned me a half a letter grade extra in one class, and i negotiated another half a letter grade in another. Even with these bonuses, I was still short of my 3.0 that i needed, while still waiting for the final grade from that very first test to be reported. For days i would visit the professors office and inquire on whether he had the final grades in, and every day i would speak with my girlfriend and bring the dissapointing news that i would not be on my way home that day, as i still did not know whether i had met the 3.0 i needed. By the time the week had ended i strapped in demoralized knowing that with the weekend coming, surely the professor now would take an extra three days to report the grade. But, out of the stroke of luck, i returned from my trip to the bowling alley to find the grade posted, and It was just barely enough to give me the average i needed to maintain my scholarships. Without hesitation i quickly called my girlfriend and we celebrated in a few moments of joy before i began packing my car to the brim to prepare for the long, but exciting trip home. Expecting my mother to arrive in the morning with her car(she was already waiting at my grandmothers house a few hours north of my campus), i hoped to get to an early start and arrive home later that day. Unfortunately, my mother made dinner plans with my grandma without informing me. When my girlfriend woke up in the middle of the day (she is a big sleeper), i could barely tell her that i was still in the state where my school is after the excitement she had shown of me coming home that day. When finally i let out the bad news, she sounded quite dissapointed and perhaps made me even feel bad about the fact that she would have to call another one of her friends to hang out when she was anticipating hanging out with me. I felt like the biggest *** in the world. I urged my mother to get on the road but she did not want to. Finally i decided that the best thing to do would be to leave bright and early. Well not very bright, pitch black in fact, at 1:30 in the morning. With an 11 hour drive at best ahead of me, I wanted so dearly to arrive home before my girlfriend had work at 4:00 in the afternoon. Making decent time throughout the trip, we closed in with about two hours worth of driving time ahead, around 11:00 when she woke up. We began talking off and on and i would tell her as i got closer. Then, of course, the traffic hit for the first time right at the end of the journey. I stayed on the phone with her updating her on the traffic and we began to worry whether i'd make it home before work. But I assured her i would, nothing was going to stop me now when i was so close. Finally I arrived, and went straight to her house, not even considering stopping off at mine, with about half an hour to spare before she would work. I entered her house in a breeze and rushed up the stairs only to find a distant and un-excited girlfriend.

I had figured she was just a little weirded out, she always told me it was a little weird for her the first time we saw each other after we'd been away for a while, so i just brushed it off, while pretty disheartened, and looked forward to unpacking a bit then spending the best of evenings with her after work. The best of evenings quickly became the worst night of my life when she told me she wanted time apart. Then as the days progressed, it got even worse as even more came out, not just time apart now, but time with someone else. Time with that guy that she always told me was just a friend. And to add to that, I wasn't allowed to speak with her for two weeks. This coming the day before our one year anniversary, the anniversary that we had celebrated every month for the past year, would now go unnoticed.

I finished up my gift for her anyway, I wanted so much to create something meaningful for her, the way she had for me, I always had my camera with me so took as many of the memories as i could fit and made a DVD out of them with music, sort of a slideshow plus on a dvd. I've never actually seen the finished product. She watched it though, and quickly the two weeks apart ended as she went out for a drive to no where and turned up at the bowling alley i was bowling at.

But then we did not see each other for a few days and she was going out with this other guy. Luckily for me he was not up for the idea of getting together with her. Having already been rejected by her a year ago, he was not up for experiencing it again, nor did he want to get involved with anything so soon after she'd been with me. See this guy is a friend of mine two, he's the drummer for the band who's show I'd gone to two years ago, where i first laid lusting eyes on my girlfriend. Our silence was once again broken when she fell ill, and I stayed by her side and watched a movie with her, we even kissed and held each other, that is until he called and invited her out for coffee. I was quickly discarded again. And again it would be a few days before we talked. But then we went out for lunch a couple days in a row, and again we kissed a couple days in a row, and things were looking up a couple days in a row. Then we didn't talk a couple days in a row... Then her car got broken into at 2 in the morning. I got there before the cops did, did what i could and then spent the night. But then i got the boot again and we didn't quite talk. You see the whole time she's been telling me to go out and have fun, meet new people and see what it's like. So finally I do. Three weeks now since my world came crashing down, sitting at a makeshift party as anti-social as ever. A seat opened up so i sat down and I actually got involved in a conversation with someone i didn't know. This girl was crazy, she wanted to burn peoples houses down, but it was refreshing to talk to her and let some of it out. I even tried ending it when it was getting more involved, I introduced a friend of mine then went to sit somewhere else. But sure enough she followed and conversate i did once more, this time it was different, as there was no one around. The mood was all perfect for a brand new start, a clear night all the stars in the sky, this very interesting girl and no one around. It almost seemed destined as she started leaning towards me, but she stopped herself and we talked about it, in only the way that that conversation would have gone. She knew I didn't want it, she saw it in me all night long ever since I'd gotten up I wanted only one person to come find me. It wasn't my brand new friend, whose number now takes up space in my phone or anyone in that company. I just wanted my girlfriend back, And I didn't want to say a word.



This was lastnight and soon after she called, we hadn't talked in days, so it was so nice to hear that special ring tone on my phone that plays only when it's her. She didn't work until six today so I picked her up. Then on the way to the park she wanted food, and on the way there her car was ready. I had so many things I wanted to say, and now it looked like none would be said, she'd be in her car and i'd be in mine we wouldn't be together. Then something happened as we were walking into the autoglass store, we found ourselves together wrapped in each others arms. I went to give her a kiss on the cheek, and she went to as well, but the corners of our lips met and we backed a little slow. We stared into each others eyes and she kissed me once again, this time there was no mistaking it, this was meant for me. We said our goodbyes, and then kissed again, and then checked out the worksmanship on the car, and then kissed again. I followed behind her, while she dropped off her car, then we went to get food, and of course kissed again. As work time neared closer, we kissed again and again, then got one last thing of food, and then kissed again.

The wretched mood that followed me for weeks was for once lifted as i returned home. Just thinking about all that had happened, I just counted the minutes until 10:00 when she would be off of work. Her screen name got active around 10:15, and i waited ten minutes before i finally said hey. 10 minutes later, there was still no reply, so i decided to call her, and she was out with that guy.

She told me we need to get over each other, and we need time apart. Funny thing is I don't want to get over her, and it seems like i'm still in her heart.

So now what?





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