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I disagree with everyone here...I really think you should give this guy a good chance...he sounds sweet, sincere, modest, and very loveable. He only sound insecure because he's just dumbfounded that a girl as pretty as you is talking to him...I think that's incredibly romantic. If you blow him off, I think you could be making a big mistake and possibly lose one of the nicest guys you'll ever meet...seriously.
I really like Scruffy's advice. But it's true, if he continues to be such a downer and always complaining about how boring he is, then I would say go for the other guys. It's nice to be with a person who's modest, but modesty is different from self-loathing. Nobody wants to date someone who's reallly depressing.
Hey Guys~

I have been out of town for the weekend so I am just now getting a chance to read responses and give you all an update of how the 2nd date with this guy went. I now just feel more confused than ever!!!!!!

*Good Points about this guy: 1)Something came up with my grandmother (her health) and instead of canceling the date he drove an extra hour to take me out in the town that she lives in. 2)He is very mannerly and opens all doors for me and pays for everything 3) He seems to be a really nice person--a gentleman.

*Bad Points about this guy: 1)I started feeling depressed after about 5 mins of being around him (Which a friend of mine had told me that if I started to feel this way to just act that way to see if he tried to cheer me up, instead of me just trying to be the cheery person--even if I felt depressed. Well, it didn't work--he just acted worried and thought that it was his fault (by being boring) that I was acting not-happy and he kept apologizing and I told him that I was the boring one--and he said impossible (which got on my nerves because I was very nice--but I certainly wasn't my usual self--I felt like a big bore!) 2)He just seems to be getting serious too fast--I could tell at the end of the night that he wanted to ask me to not date other people--but I changed the subject because I was just ready to get in the house so I could think more clearly without him staring at me.

Anyway, I am just very confused because it is very rare to find such a nice, gentleman-acting guy, but then again I don't feel excited to see him. So I don't know if it is just me (I have had a lot going on lately) or if it is him making me feel this way.

I am going on a date with another guy tomorrow (whom I haven't been out with yet) so I am hoping that will help clear things up and maybe help me to better see how I feel about the other guy. I just feel so confused!!
[QUOTE=glamourgal]*Good Points about this guy: 1)Something came up with my grandmother (her health) and instead of canceling the date he drove an extra hour to take me out in the town that she lives in. 2)He is very mannerly and opens all doors for me and pays for everything 3) He seems to be a really nice person--a gentleman.

*Bad Points about this guy: 1)I started feeling depressed after about 5 mins of being around him (Which a friend of mine had told me that if I started to feel this way to just act that way to see if he tried to cheer me up, instead of me just trying to be the cheery person--even if I felt depressed. Well, it didn't work--he just acted worried and thought that it was his fault (by being boring) that I was acting not-happy and he kept apologizing and I told him that I was the boring one--and he said impossible (which got on my nerves because I was very nice--but I certainly wasn't my usual self--I felt like a big bore!) 2)He just seems to be getting serious too fast--I could tell at the end of the night that he wanted to ask me to not date other people--but I changed the subject because I was just ready to get in the house so I could think more clearly without him staring at me.

Anyway, I am just very confused because it is very rare to find such a nice, gentleman-acting guy, but then again I don't feel excited to see him. So I don't know if it is just me (I have had a lot going on lately) or if it is him making me feel this way.

I am going on a date with another guy tomorrow (whom I haven't been out with yet) so I am hoping that will help clear things up and maybe help me to better see how I feel about the other guy. I just feel so confused!![/QUOTE]

I definitely agree that you should move on, date other guys, and not waste anymore time with a guy who not only depresses you, but makes you feel bad about yourself!! If he's having that effect on you so soon, it's only going to get worse over time, and the whole point of relationships is to make your life happier and find someone who you feel really confident and secure around. If being around someone drags you down and puts you in a worse mood than you'd be if you were alone, then there's really no point in having that person be part of your life. People would be so much happier if they would be more firm and less ambivalent about surrounding themselves with people who enrich their lives--while everyone goes through rough patches, and friendships and relationships won't always be all positive, it's still important to cut people out of your life when they consistently have a negative impact on you. Life is too short to waste with people who bring you down and prevent you from finding and spending time with those whose company and companionship you truly enjoy. Please try not to continue seeing this guy because you feel sorry for him, see some good qualities in him, or hope he will change, because people hardly ever actually do change their basic natures. It's too bad that this guy's good points are overshadowed by his unusually low self-esteem and insecurities, but that's his problem, and I hope you don't allow it to become your problem as well. As for nice, gentlemantly guys, there really are more of them out there than you think, so please don't settle for this one just because you think you'll have trouble finding someone else who treats you respectfully and kindly. You'll know that you've found a good match for you when you feel like the happiest, best possible version of yourself around him, and you have way too much going for you to settle for anyone who has the opposite impact on you when you're in his presence. Enjoy your date with the new guy, and I hope you politely tell the depressed guy that you just don't feel like you're a good match, then move on and date guys you actually enjoy being around.





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