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Hey everyone here is my story I will make it kinda short! I am 27 and this guy I started dating 2 months ago is 38. When he found out I wasn't dating anyone he persued me quite a bit. We get along great, we laugh, cry, miss eachother all the time. Talk about everything and family, future, goals and everything else. He was like a dream come true cause I have always dated *** wipes. I consider myself a very mature person and he is very mature. Everything was great until a week ago and he started to slack a little. He would say he would call me and then didn't a few times. He appeared sad, I could tell something was wrong. We both have prior engagements to attend over the past weekend so we couldn't see eachother much. I ended up seeing him very late at night. He didn't have the same happy smile to see me like usual. Then we went home did our thing and the morning. He had already said he would spend the day with me. Then changed his mind and couldn't decide for sure that maybe he would help a friend move. I got mad and left and then called me. He told me he has been feeling "sad" lately and disappointed that he can't make up his mind about his living situation. Whether to build or rent a house. We have talked about this and his ex- wife and her kids a lot.

Here is where I think the problem is... He said to me that his two girls(by marriage only)had a birthday and that is what has really been bothering him all week. I said "why didn't you tell me?" his reply was "I didn't want to burden you"! Okay for one thing it never bothered me at all that he considered those girls his own. It was a burden that he didn't tell me. Then he said, " I want to go but I don't want to see my ex-wife and her lover, who he found her in bed with. He just found out within our time of dating that she is marrying this guy and is 3 months pregnant. He ended up not calling me back and went to this birthday party for 9 hours, yeah 9 hours. I asked him why so long? He said oh I get along with her family so well and his two girls fell asleep in his arms. I just think 9 hours in a very uncomfortable situation is strange, besides seeing the girls. He stated he felt like he had been at a "funeral all day long". He never really brought his ex up too much but compared things with her sometimes. Also brought up what she took from him and other crap. Meanwhile through this time of dating he never made me feel terrible, or was ever sad like this, always told me I was so beautiful and was very close to falling in love with me. He would go the extra mile to make me feel special.

We had discussed his sudden mood change and his past he said to "his knowledge he is over her". Well I don't think so, I think he hasn't accepted it completely. The last night I had seen him was monday night, after his apologizing for his being distant toward me his hugs and kisses felt fake. The very next morning I left him a 3 page letter. Explaining all over again how his change and feelings have made me take a step back. Basically I wrote , I am sorry for what she did to you, you told me in the beginning that you were ready to date after 1 1/2 years of being single. we were sooo happy together and then you started to change. You need to accept what she did and move on, was everything you said to me true? I miss you already but I need to protect myself from getting hurt anymore, call me when you figure out where you life, heart and feelings are at, I miss you already!

I am just about done with my story, So I left this letter on his bed 3 days he finally called me today and just left a message with my sister that he called and that was it. I called him back an hour later after I got home and he didn't answer either phone. So my question is what should I do exactly and do you agree with me?

Thanks, Shania

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