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Relationship Health Message Board


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Eight months ago I just packed up and moved a few hours to the city to be with my boyfriend, because my life was going nowhere in the small college town where I lived post-graduation. He moved here about six months before me. Neither of us made many friends right away because we moved to a completely new city where we knew no one.

I have not adjusted very well yet. I haven't made any friends at all, and my college friends don't really keep in touch anymore either. I am having problems with depression and my first job didn't really work out. So now I'm starting the job search all over again. So the only person I really know is my boyfriend.

Our relationship was going great until he met this girl he works with. Since they started hanging out, he has been growing progressively distant from me. He goes out to party about 5-6 nights a week. He doesn't even come home 3-4 of those nights. And I don't get any phone calls. I have talked to him about it, telling him that I would appreciate a phone call if he's going to be in late, or not at all, so I can have peace of mind as to where he is. I am, after all, not just a roommate, but engaged to this man.

The first time we talked about my feelings, he agreed, but he hasn't called me yet a single night he's been out late. He just strolls in the next morning acting completely innocent. The second time we talked, I explained my feelings to him even more thoroughly. He says its embarassing in front of his friends to have to check in with his girlfriend at like 4 in the morning. Am I being unreasonable??!! I don't think I am at all!! Don't I have a right to know where he is and who he's hanging out with? I'm not prying or nagging about it at all, and I'm not beating this subject to the ground with him.

But I have no friends at all, and the man who was once my best friend for 4 years is now my boyfriend of 1 year, and the root of this problem, so I cannot turn to him. I'm scared that he's falling for this girl, and that is what's going on. Its like I'm just waiting for a bomb to explode! Please give me some third party advice before I drown in worry! I am in such a panic. He's the only thing I've got going for me right now, and I feel I will go to pieces if this ends. I'm so scared!





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