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Well, it's been a week and a half since my girlfriend told me she wanted to back away from our relationship. I posted earlier when it first happened and since that time she has emailed and called a couple of times. On Tuesday she told me that her counselor told her that it would be OK to see me casually and even have a sexual relationship but that she did not need to be in a serious relationship until she resolved some issues in her life. As an update, I am in my mid-40's and she is in her mid 30's. I emailed her a very short note yesterday and joked about the causual sex thing and just told her that I hoped that she had a good week. She emailed back and called later and asked if she could come up and see me, we live about 1.5 hours apart. She did come up and we ate out, played tennis and talked alot. She tells me that this time away is not about me but getting her life on track and making right decisions. She told me that last summer when things started to heat up she should have tried to slow them down some since she was divorced only a short time but that I was so"wonderful" she couldn't do it. We agreed that we will see other people etc but she wants to still see me and call everynow and then. She described our time as the "greates love affair" she has ever had and also that I should not worry about her seeing others as none will probably be nearly as good as me.

I know that she is totally honest and I think very confused about what she wants from life. She also is dealing with a mentally ill mother and very sick grandmother and her grandfather who raised her died last month. I told her last night that I thought there was probably a 10% chance that we would end up back together and she said why did I think so low. She again said it wasn't about me but her and trying to like herself and get her life in focus.

I think I may date but I have never felt like this about anyone before. Some of my friends say that all the things she has going on is no excuse but I do think that she is confused. She also told me it would have been much easier to continue in our relationship but taht it was not fair to me as her feelings were not growing and that she needs time away to sort it all out.

Am I a fool to continue to have hope? We had a wonderful, albeit, sexless time last night, laughed much and cried a little. We both admited that we care deeply for each other. She said though that she doesn't want to keep pulling the scab back and hurting me everytime she calls but that she wants to see me and keep a thread of friendship going.

What do you think?


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