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[QUOTE=SophiaM]Stacy, you're absolutely right--we are feeling the fear because we have become vulnerable and there's more at stake now if things were not to work out. I know I would be extremely disappointed. Hopefully this will not be the case and we are both worrying needlessly. I know you are, because I just can't imagine that a guy who wants to spend as much time with you as Justin does, gives you a key to his house, and helps you move would not be crazy about you! I'm feeling a bit more insecure today because last night, when NG dropped me off after the BBQ, I didn't want him to stay over at my apartment because I hadn't have time to clean it up beforehand, and it was a bit of a mess and I wanted it to look nice for him. So he drove home after he dropped me off, which is almost 1.5 hrs drive from my place and it was already pretty late. This morning I called him to see if he got home ok, but he hasn't called me back. I left him another message about an hour ago, and still no response, and he usually calls back right away. I really hope he didn't get too offended that I didn't let him stay over last night, and I am also concerned if he made it home alright. Hopefully he's just busy with something or left his cellphone at home. But I can't help but feeling very worried. I guess it would look stupid if I called again, so thing I should probably just wait, but I can't really concentrate on anything. I hate being so anxious and unsettled. I am trying to study for an exam tomorrow but find it impossible to calm down.

Oh yeah, and I can also relate to you in not wanting to be the first one to declare my feelings. LOL. Wonder how long it will take for our respective engineers. One thing I've noticed is engineers are not the most naturally inclined to talk about their feelings. Hopefully it means that when they finally do feel inclined, at least they really mean it![/QUOTE]

Hi Sophia,

I really wouldn't worry about NG not calling--I'll bet anything he's out doing something and either didn't bring his phone or isn't getting reception. Maybe he's just planning on calling you back later when he's back home and not surrounded by a crowd. I'm sure everything's OK--though honestly, not having cleaned your apartment is no reason not to let him stay if you'd like him with you overnight otherwise. Trust me, he could care less about a mess, which I'm sure isn't even something he'd consider messy. He's so busy looking at you and thinking how sexy you are and how much you wants you that there's no way he even bothers looking around at your apartment and noticing how clean it is. There's nothing wrong with letting him see you without having everything be perfect, too--you're a human being and things get messy sometime. If he really likes you, he'll like you for who you are, flaws included. Believe me, Justin's seen my new place looking like a war zone, with junk thrown everywhere, and all he cares about is being close to me, preferably in bed together :D.

So while NG may have been a bit disappointed not to spend the night with you, it's never a bad thing to give him a little time to wait and build his anticipation for you...I'm assuming you guys are physically involved by now? Sorry if I'm wrong on that. I guess a month isn't really that long to be involved before sleeping together in many people's minds; I've just never been able to hold off that long when I am with a guy I really like and find attractive. I was very proud of myself for waiting as long as I did until Justin got tested for STDs and had to wait a week for the results--that was tough, lol! ;) Anyway, as you guys know, I don't think there's such a thing as sleeping together too soon as long as it feels right to both of you. I have never ever met a man worth having who would lose interest in a girl he was crazy about just because they had a great night of sex soon after meeting! Well, sorry for getting off track there. I just wanted to throw my $.02 in regarding waiting for NG to return your call...I'm sure there's no reason for him to be holding off on getting back to you. I wouldn't call him again though. Anymore than twice before he returns you call starts to look a bit desperate...though I can completely understand where you're coming from in being concerned even though you know there's probably no reason to worry. I do the same thing if I haven't heard back from J as quickly as I would have liked...even if it hasn't been a full day yet, I still start wondering if I did something to turn him off without realizing it last time we were together, and time and time again he proves me wrong and makes me feel silly for getting so worried. NG has consistently demonstrated a sincere interest in you, and the great thing about somewhat reserved cautious engineers like ours :D is that while they may be slow to open up, they also tend to be very genuine once they do express their feelings to you and start to become attached to you.

Good luck studying for your exam tomorrow--try not to let yourself worry anymore, just think of all the times in the past you've been concerned about not hearing from NG and then had him come through for you as promised each time. I'm sure he'll call you tonight or tomorrow, and in the meantime, hopefully you will have had a nice relaxing night and had a chance to properly prepare yourself for your test. Has he said anything so far about how he feels about you? Justin seems to have quite a tough time voicing his emotions, although I'm pretty sure he's falling in love with me, going by how guys have treated me in the past. When I tell him things like how much I care for him and love spending time with him, I can tell he's just delighted and he always reciprocates my sentiments, so I know deep down that he's just shy and reserved about talking about how he feels. I can totally understand that--it's not like we ladies are immune from worrying about being vulnerable and not having our feelings reciprocated! But if we and our engineers are both consistently demonstrating to each other that we're really into each other and want to be together, then I don't think any of the four of us have anything to worry about :). I'm actually wondering if I should let Justin know I'm falling in love with him...I think he might need a little push. I'd definitely wait until things settle down again and we have a few days to get past this weekend drama, but I'm considering asking him if he thinks he could be falling in love with me. I think he's only the second guy I've dated not to say I love you by the end of a month together, though I get the sense he's fallen for me especially fast and hard, so I'll see how things go and not rule out speaking up before long. Well anyway, have a great night Sophia, and best wishes tomorrow in school. Keep us up to date on how things go with NG OK? I know we're all rooting for you and I especially like hearing about how things are progressing since our situations are so similar and seem to be so promising. :)

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