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[QUOTE=greeneyes100]I don't think you should call him or email him or initiate anything further; let him do it from now on. Also, I don't think you should necessarily return all of his calls. I know it sounds like game playing, but like another poster said, it's more like restoring balance to the relationship. It seems like you are doing a little more giving at this point. So, wait for him to come to you, and then when he does, give of yourself in increments. A psychologist wrote this is the best way to build romance. She said if you give too much of yourself too soon, it often kills a budding romance.

Good luck, Sophia, and I think after he doesn't see you for awhile, he will be begging for your company again. :bouncing:[/QUOTE]

Hey Greeneyes :wave: Just to be clear, I very rarely call him myself, but I usually return his calls quite promptly and do pick up the phone when I can. I guess it's because I know how much I hate it myself when someone I like doesn't pick up or takes hours or days to call back. It would be very anxiety causing for me to just be waiting and not knowing what happened and not hear back from the person for a while, so that's why I never wanted to do that to him. He has been quite good at keeping his word whenever he promises to call, etc, so I never had a reason to not reciprocate his so far reliable behavior. I hate men who say they will call you the next day, for example, and then you don't hear from them for a week. Absolutely can't stand that and I don't think he deserves me not returning his calls at this point. My friends boyfriend used to do that to her---not pick up the phone for the entire day and not call her back, even if they had to speak to confirm plans for the next day. She would get all bent out of shape and call him around 100 times, and imagine he wants to dump her, and other worst-case scenarios. I think he did this from time to time purely for his own enjoyment of seeing how much she's into him and scared to lose him. I wouldn't stand for such behavior personally.
[QUOTE=SophiaM]Hey Greeneyes :wave: Just to be clear, I very rarely call him myself, but I usually return his calls quite promptly and do pick up the phone when I can. I guess it's because I know how much I hate it myself when someone I like doesn't pick up or takes hours or days to call back. It would be very anxiety causing for me to just be waiting and not knowing what happened and not hear back from the person for a while, so that's why I never wanted to do that to him. He has been quite good at keeping his word whenever he promises to call, etc, so I never had a reason to not reciprocate his so far reliable behavior. I hate men who say they will call you the next day, for example, and then you don't hear from them for a week. Absolutely can't stand that and I don't think he deserves me not returning his calls at this point. My friends boyfriend used to do that to her---not pick up the phone for the entire day and not call her back, even if they had to speak to confirm plans for the next day. She would get all bent out of shape and call him around 100 times, and imagine he wants to dump her, and other worst-case scenarios. I think he did this from time to time purely for his own enjoyment of seeing how much she's into him and scared to lose him. I wouldn't stand for such behavior personally.[/QUOTE]

Sophia, you have to do whatever is the most comfortable and natural for YOU. I'm just telling you what I would do if I were in your shoes.

I have used some of these tactics (which I guess you could call game playing) when I thought a man was losing interest, and they usually worked.

Sorry, Rose, but I don't feel it is manipulating someone to do this. It is simply a way to restore the balance in a relationship, especially when one person is giving more of themselves than the other person.

I think if NG thought that maybe you might be losing some interest, he might be a little more aggressive in making plans to see you. Get the drift?

But, if you don't feel as if you are giving more of yourself than he is and you like the way things are, then I would just keep on doing what you are doing.

All I know is, from past experience, that whenever I laid all my cards on the table in the beginning of a relationship, I never got the guy. The ones that were the most attracted to me were the ones I didn't necessarily like that much at first.

Some people think that once the challenge is gone, they won't love you anymore. I simply do not agree with this. I think because a woman is a challenge, he loves her even more because he had to work harder to get her.

Just my two cents.





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