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Hi everyone,
I posted long ago about my break-up, but I will give a little refresher just so I can ask for some advice...
We broke up in January after a 4 year relationship (we're both 22). He broke up with me saying he still loved me but didn't feel the same and it was more of a friendship. He said he wanted to remain friends after I had some time to 'get over it.' I was utterly shocked because we had always planned on having a life together. Anyway, after a tough month, I decided to let him do all the talking, so I no longer called him (not that I had very much), and instead waited for him to call me. He called maybe once/week and after that initial month we never spoke of the 'relationship' again, just general chatting and catching up on each other's week. I saw him rarely and by accident, and it was awkward and uncomfortable. But he still said 'i love you' at the end of every phone call or meeting.

Now-- fast forward to about three weeks ago. He starts talking about 'hanging out' because he has a graduation gift for me, and needs help with some school stuff. Later he decided that he wanted to do something fun rather than study so we did end up getting together to see a movie. It was familiar in some ways (we shared a drink, he bought my ticket), however it was not a 'date'-no hand holding or the sort. After that night he told me we could 'start hanging out more.' I took that to mean that he had decided that I was at a point where I could do it without getting upset...but I don't know. We didn't talk for two weeks after that b/c he's been unbelievably busy with his masters degree work. Basically his whole life is changing, he is making tons of different friends at school, moving to school during the week, just doing tons of things he never used to do. That actually kind of breaks my heart because it means he is drifting further and further away, however when we are together he is still the same person that I came to know and love.
Tonight we had another get-together, another movie and some ice cream. This time he seemed more comfortable with the situation. I told him a story about something that had happened to me last week (involving a dangerous situation that the kid i'm dating put me in) and he absolutely freaked out. He got very very upset. I had to beg him not to call the kid in all his anger, and he says if he ever sees him he will....well something that is not so nice...
'i better not find out if he ever puts you in danger again...' etc.
When it was time to go home for the night he tells me that I should push to make plans because he's so busy but he wants to start doing more. He wants me to start calling him whereas before he told me that would probably not be the best idea. (when i was still upset i guess)

SOOO (bless you if you've read this much!) now for my questions...I am desperate for insight or advice about this situation.
I just can't figure him out. I always believed him when he said he wanted to be friends, but this is just confusing me to no end. I can't figure out if he knows that I still have those feelings for him, or if he thinks I'm 'over it' and ready to be friends because of my good behavior (not calling, not talking about the relationship, etc.) As far as I'm concerned, I don't know how much of this I can take, because when I'm with him I'm so happy and I just want it to go back to the way it was, and then when it's over I kick myself because he is probably just thinking that we're ready for 'friend' mode, and completely moved on. I don't know if I should bring up the fact that I am still very much in love with him. I can't figure out if he's acting this way because he truly feels I am a good friend, or if there are more feelings left for him too. Why does he act so protective of me, and so caring, if I am just some friend? Maybe because of the bond we had, I don't know. I just can't figure him out. Does he really think I have moved on and am fine with this? Is it possible that he missed me? My personal opinion is that he kind of enjoys having this 'hold' on me because I will just go with whatever he decides. He is just so difficult to understand.

As a sidenote, I have had three psychics tell me that he will want to reconcile in the near future. However I understand that it could be BS. She also told me that he secretly wants me to come out with the relationship talk because he's too afraid to ask for a reconciliation. And that he is trying to use reverse psychology on me by pretending he doesn't care that much. All of that makes little sense to me...but truthfully he hid the fact that he wanted to break-up for a while, so he could be hiding more I suppose.

I don't really know what kind of advice, exactly, I'm looking for. How do you all think I should handle this situation? I don't want to lose him even if it means only a friendship, but I feel that there is still no closure here. I don't know how to act or what to say with him...I just don't understand him at all. Why does a guy want to keep an ex as a 'friend' if they are no longer good enough to be a girlfriend? Wouldn't they normally just want to move on?

I read a quote somewhere that said "past lovers who become friends are either still in love, or never were"

Thank you for any input. I really appreciate it. This is killing me.





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