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Relationship Health Message Board

Relationship Health Board Index

There is a reason everyone is telling you to leave him and that is because unlike you, outside observers can see this relationship for what it is: a vicious cycle of abuse. This man is tearing down your self-esteem and making you feel insecure and desperate, like you'll be nothing and never happy again without him. This is exactly how he wants you to feel so he can keep treating you horribly, then throw you a tiny scrap of kindness and reign you back into his sick pattern of abuse. Things are not going to get better and in fact, the chances are very good that his abuse will continue to escalate until you find the courage and strength to walk away. Try to look at your situation objectively as if it was happening to a close friend--what advice would you give her? Can you see the futility in thinking this is your fault when your BF is the one causing all your sadness and frustration? He is a deeply insecure, abusive person, and nothing you can do will change that. No matter how much you love him, he is a very bad influence in your life, and you need to find the strength and love for yourself deep inside and use that to motivate you to act in your own best interests and walk away. He is never going to change or treat you well...the only choice you have is to leave, otherwise you'll only let him abuse you more and more until you don't have anymore will to get away and be happy again. Please don't let him tear you down and ruin your life anymore than he already's only going to get worse and harder to leave the longer you let him abuse you.

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