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First off, let me start off by saying I am extremely jealous person. So is my boyfriend. We understand this about each other and have learned to cope with it. However, he really has been hurting my feelings lately!

First of all, my boyfriend and I have known each other for 5 years now. We dated off and on during. We met when I was 15 (I'm 19 almost 20 now) and of course skinnier. I had an eating disorder (that I battle with still to this day) and was on the low end of 95 pounds. I have gone through having a baby and getting up too 200 pounds with my son. As of now I am down to about 123 (but I think I look more like 130 or so). I think that's an incrediable weight loss and I thought I was doing well with my weight and I was handling my E.D. He always tells me how beautiful I am etc. But the other day we were sitting down and I made some comment about getting fat and he shakes his head and says "if you think that then why don't you do something about it". That took me back a bit because I felt like he was agreeing with me. Then that next day we were watching the news and a story about an anorexic came on. He mentioned how disgusting she looked and asked me "if I have ever gotten that skinny". I thought that was kind of weird so I ignored him. Then he asked me how much I weighed when we first dated (back when I was 15 and about 95 pounds) and I shook my head and said I don't remember. He said, "because you still have some baby fat on you" then he paused a second and said "that I never want you to loose". That took me back and floored me. I had to go to the bathroom because I started crying. I don't know why that hurt me so bad but it did.

He has been asking for some pictures of me and I just got some developed with a friend of mine. She is absolutly gorgeous let me say. Typical skinny, small blonde hair girl. She is definitely perfect.

He has met her once before. He has a brother that we hang out with a lot that is looking for a girlfriend. Her name has been brought up a lot lately among us and he is interested in meeting her.

Anyways...there was one picture that I thought was good of me (my friend is in it too) so I brought it to him. Now in defense of him, he has never intentionally said anything to hurt my feelings and never intentionally tried to make me jealous (that I know of) but he looks at this picture and says "oh yeah...he'll definitely want to meet her now". I said, "excuse me" and he goes "well she's cute... my brother asked me what she looked like and I told her that she was cute". I just stood and looked at him a minute and he says "well shes not near as cute/beautiful as you".

I don't know why that bothered me so much but it kinda stung. Like I said, I am a terribly jealous person. I can handle him commenting here and there about celebs or what-not but not my friend. I just think that a boyfriend/husband or wife/girlfriend should NEVER comment about your friends. I feel like it's a boundary you cross you know. Now, I am scared to death to bring him around her.

We talked about it for a long time and he said that I was blowing it out of proportion and that there are millions or cute/attractive girls out there but that doesn't mean he wants anything from them and that he only loves me! He said in defense of hisself that when we are out in public he makes it a point NOT to look at other girls because he wouldn't want to make me think he was looking else where. We were by his car and he reached in and grabbed the picture and asked if I had scissors because he was going to cut her out of the picture if it would make me feel better. He apologized about saying what he did about her and by the end of the night he was telling me how sexy and beautiful I was and how lucky he was to have me. I know he was trying to fix things but I just didn't know how to feel. It makes me sick to my stomach to think of him thinking about HER like that.

Did I maybe blow it out of proportion or do I have a point??? I just didn't need to hear that on top of the whole weight thing going on ya know.?





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