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[QUOTE=thghtsreal]Could this be a sugar-daddy gig? You are 39% older than she is (23 X 1.39 = 32 Oh my Gosh! :eek: ). Your age difference would be like you dating a 45 year old woman - so who would be paying for what if that was the case?

If it IS a sugar-daddy gig, think before you do something rash. It might not be a bad gig. You could be dating a thirty-something woman and still paying for everything.

Seriously. I'm not trying to be nasty. She might have a slightly different look at your relationship.[/QUOTE]

But why would she choose a sugar daddy who made less money than she did? I can understand what you're saying about her viewing the relationship differently if she had insisted all along on not paying her share of the vacation costs, but it concerns me that she has changed her tune about this after initially agreeing with you. Have other things changed lately in your relationship? It kind of sounds like she is starting to pull away, not to be overly pessimistic, but it could be that she is feeling like she's too young to be in a committed relationship. I hope that's not the case and this is just a minor issue, but it would explain why she's been complaining about you or your routine being boring. I have talked and acted similarly in the past when I started to feel a little smothered or just bored with relationships. It seemed to me like the spark had gone out and things were getting really routine, which caused me to crave something new and exciting and pull away and "need space" as a result. I'm not saying the same thing is happening with your GF, but it definitely can't hurt to try to shake up your routine and make an effort to be more spontaneous in and out of the bedroom. If you can bring back that feeling of newness that makes relationships so fun at the start, you may be able to turn things around pretty quickly...even little changes can make a big difference. The question is, do you want to get this relationship back on track? It sounds like you're feeling a little used and taken advantage of...I haven't read your past threads but I will and see if I can think of more accurate, specific advice for you. In the meantime, you're probably best off giving her some space, thinking of ways to add some spice and variety to your relationship, and staying positive. I wish you all the best and hope things work out well for you :).
[QUOTE=Gundam]Thx for the replies guys.

I'm very disappointed, that she failed to understand the whole picture ... I wanna have my own place to share with her, so that we don't have to force ourselves to go out just because we wanna be alone (we both live with our parents) but all she cares about is excitment right now, enjoyment right now. She basically indicated to me that ... I wanna have fun now, & you are responsible. [B][I]Your future's none of my fu_king business[/I][/B].
QUOTE]

Ya...

That is kinda what I mean by you being a sugar-daddy to this 23 year old girl. Maybe there is another word for it, but if she wants you to pay for everything and "[I]your future is none of her #@$%*&% business[/I]", then this is a 'special arrangement' rather than a personal connection.
[QUOTE=thghtsreal][QUOTE=Gundam]Thx for the replies guys.

I'm very disappointed, that she failed to understand the whole picture ... I wanna have my own place to share with her, so that we don't have to force ourselves to go out just because we wanna be alone (we both live with our parents) but all she cares about is excitment right now, enjoyment right now. She basically indicated to me that ... I wanna have fun now, & you are responsible. [B][I]Your future's none of my fu_king business[/I][/B].
QUOTE]

Ya...

That is kinda what I mean by you being a sugar-daddy to this 23 year old girl. Maybe there is another word for it, but if she wants you to pay for everything and "[I]your future is none of her #@$%*&% business[/I]", then this is a 'special arrangement' rather than a personal connection.[/QUOTE]


I agree with the post above. If her future isn't any of your business, that's a clear indication that you are not apart of it. Perhaps because you're older she feels that your in a position to be financially responsible for her or maybe she's beginning to feel the age difference and she realizes that she doesn't want to settle down yet.

Either way, this isn't good and it's probably not a good idea to go on a trip together right now.
[QUOTE=thghtsreal]
If it IS a sugar-daddy gig, think before you do something rash. It might not be a bad gig. You could be dating a thirty-something woman and still paying for everything.
[/QUOTE]

What are you trying to say, that dating a thirty-something woman is inherently worse than dating a twenty-something woman, solely because of her age? I find that notion extremely offensive. There are plenty of 30-something women who are more beautiful, far more sophisticated, more mature, and smarter than some 20-something women. Perhaps it's slightly off topic, but I thought it should be pointed out. I think it's far more important to look at the qualities of each individual rather than making general assumptions like that.
[QUOTE=Gundam]You are right thghtsreal. In normal circumstances I should just go ahead with our trip, probably shag her like a rabbit & worry about our relationship later; but I just know that I'd be very uncomfortable doing that. If I know that she's gonna fade away & out of my life eventually, then I'd rather have nothing to do with her, sooner than later, full stop. .[/QUOTE]

Gundam, you are indeed a unique fellow. Considering the circumstance, you don't have to worry about shagging her and breaking her heart. Quite contrair. Your challenge will be to resist falling more helplessly in love with HER! She seems to already know the score.

It would appear as though your relationship has a certain finite predisposal at this time (ie; it seems you may be breaking up soon). You know, it can be quite a spell from your break-up to your next primal interaction with a real-live human female. This cruise might be a good opportunity for "your ship to empty it's ballast holds" so to speak.

As for YOU, our young kitten Eagle, if it is free cruises you want, free cruises you shall have! Find yourself in the company of 30+ year old professional males (preferably single). Be not modest in expressing your interests and I can assure you that your skin shall be long in the sun-painted tones of olive color (ie, you will always be sun-tanned from cruises and vacations). There are PLENTY of men who would find such a proposal much to their appeal and not beyond their financial means. My GUESS is that one of those men might be our very own master GUNDAM given a few months time with his own companionship.

Cheers everyone! Bon Voyage! :wave: :bouncing: :wave:
[QUOTE=thghtsreal]Gundam, you are indeed a unique fellow. Considering the circumstance, you don't have to worry about shagging her and breaking her heart. Quite contrair. Your challenge will be to resist falling more helplessly in love with HER! She seems to already know the score.

It would appear as though your relationship has a certain finite predisposal at this time (ie; it seems you may be breaking up soon). You know, it can be quite a spell from your break-up to your next primal interaction with a real-live human female. This cruise might be a good opportunity for "your ship to empty it's ballast holds" so to speak.

As for YOU, our young kitten Eagle, if it is free cruises you want, free cruises you shall have! Find yourself in the company of 30+ year old professional males (preferably single). Be not modest in expressing your interests and I can assure you that your skin shall be long in the sun-painted tones of olive color (ie, you will always be sun-tanned from cruises and vacations). There are PLENTY of men who would find such a proposal much to their appeal and not beyond their financial means. My GUESS is that one of those men might be our very own master GUNDAM given a few months time with his own companionship.

Cheers everyone! Bon Voyage! :wave: :bouncing: :wave:[/QUOTE]
n

I think this is excellent advice, as is what portergirl said about you being at different emotional stages of your lives and her viewing the stability you seek and take pride in as boring compared to the ever so glamorous starving student lifestyle we all embrace in our early twenties. At least everyone who eventually worked for their money, who are the only people whose financial success I respect and admire. Gundam, you should really feel proud of yourself for having your priorities straight and planning to establish And I especially hope the paragraph about my chances for free cruises proves true! You have a really charming and amusing way with words, thghtsreal, and I am i mpressed by anyone who can convey such a playful sense of humor across the internet, particularly on a message board, where things like tone and intent can be so easily misconstrued. Thanks again thghtsreal (is that like thoughts real w/o vowels)? I assume that's where your name comes from? Anyway, keep spreading my cruise companion offer around for me please ;)? And Gundam, please hang in there and trust that you are a sweet kind, trustworthy man who would make millions of women very happy if you were their boyfriend! I think your current GF just wants to indulge her changing whims without too much concern for her actions' impact on other people's feelings, and you deserve a lot more considering how much you spoil her!





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