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Relationship Health Message Board

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I've been here a long time and I've hesitated to write this because even online we end up with a "rep" to keep up and I'm going to blow mine out of the water with this...
But - ignoring the age issue I also would suggest that you live with the guilt on the assumption that you will never (never EVER) decide to come clean even after time has passed or as long as you are with this guy.
I was single over 2x as old as you are. I didn't meet my husband until I was 34. There was a guy I met when I was 22 & fell head over chemistry heels with. We dated for several years and then off and on (eleven yrs worth) until the day I met Mr. Ruth.
When I got engaged I went to see this man to say good-bye. And I do mean good-bye. Not just an adios.
For someone who has morals, values and ethics coming out of her ying-yang this would be totally unbelievable to anyone who knew me.... If I chose to tell them.
But - it's none of their business, and I have been married 16 yrs now with the sure knowledge that I would throw up if I ever had to have sex with someone other than my husband.
Figure that out, huh?

Factor in the age here and I would suggest that she keep this incident private and make sure there is a LONG period of time before ever getting married. Personally I have no idea WHY my one single lifetime incident does not eat away at my conscience.
It surprises me more than you could ever imagine that it doesn't...
But that was 16 years ago. Not the beginning of a lifetime of cheating as many here would assume.

I am human. So is YeahI'mScared.
I do understand that many of you have been horribly hurt by a no good serial cheater.
Please try to understand that amongst those awful people are a few human beings who made a mistake. Who were human.
Like me.

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