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[QUOTE=Mattm4000]Hi everyone,

Maybe some of you can give me some suggestions here. I am a 26 year old single male and basically I couldn't get a girlfriend to save my life. I am embarassed to even admit that but its become a reality for me. Just to provide some background information about myself. I am 26, I am of average height and weight. I consider my appearence to be average. I am well-groomed, I try to dress well and I take good physical care of myself. I also live in a major city in the Northeastern United States. Ok,its New York City, you dragged it out of

To provide some insight into my past relationships when I was 19 I met a truly wonderful girl that I can safely say that she was the first girl I ever truly loved and cared for. To cut a very long story short we stayed together approximately three years and then one day things started to change and we couldnt get along together anymore and she changed alot and then I eventually found out that she found someone else and it was all over with between us. Needless to say I was heartbroken at the least. Well me and her broke up in May of 2000 which was obviously over 5 years ago at this point and I went through all the emotions and stuff and even though there is a part of me that still cares for her I realize its over and it could never be anymore.

My problem has been that since then I have had no luck falling in love again. I have had dates and I have met people since then but I am looking for a girlfriend, a relationship, someone to love,etc. and it seems like Mission Impossible at this point. Let me provide insight into my last two prospects. One girl I met through an online personal ad back in November of 2004, after a few weeks talking we met one night, went out to dinner had,in my opinion, a great first date, then three days later we hung out again and then the next day she came online and told me that no way would it work out between us in the long term and that we should end it now before we get too attached whch we did as per her wishes. I liked her alot and didn't want it to end like that but I really had no other choice. Two months later I asked another girl out, now this girl I liked for years but I never had the courage to talk to her. One day I finally did..I asked her out, she said yes very pleasantly and sincerely, gave her my phone number, she said she would call me within a few days to set something up and lets just say that was January and I am still waiting for that call which obviously is not going to happen.

My problem is that I have no luck meeting anyone and then when I do meet someone either the girl rejects me or she hangs out with me once or twice and then ends it. I ask friends if they can set me up with anyone and they all say the same thing...that all of their female friends have boyfriends or husbands. Honestly, I dont see anything wrong with me as to why a girl wouldnt want to date me. I have a good job, I work about 40-45 hours a week. I have a nice car, nice house,etc.. and I consider myself to be a very outgoing and friendly person. I have decent friends and many people comment on how nice of a person I am. So that leaves me asking one question...what could the problem be?

The other thing with me is that I hate bars and drinking so I dont go to those type of places. Yes, I know that bars are major "hook up" places for people, I really dont want to date a girl that frequents bars anyway and most people tend to tell me that a bar is not a good place to meet a nice girl anyway. I also visit all the other places to try to meet people including libraries, coffee shops, etc. and have no luck there. As far as girls at my job are concerned, once again all of them either have boyfriends or husbands as well.

Does anyone have any advice for me as to what I might be doing wrong or good ideas on how to meet someone? I should also mention that I am rather shy when it comes to talking to girls. Not that I cant or wont do it, just that sometimes it doesnt always come out of my mouth on the first try.

Thanks for taking the time out to read this.[/QUOTE]

Join the crowd! It's very hard to meet someone special. Dating is truly a numbers game. The more women you date, the closer you come to finding that special girl. I'm in the same boat as you are as far as having a hard time meeting someone I truly mesh with. There are many single people who are having a hard time like yourself.

The next time you meet someone for the first time, just go and out and enjoy yourself. Don't put so much pressure on to find someone right away. Women can usually sense when a man feels desperate and this is a huge turn-off to them. Also, when picking a women from online ads, look for a profile that says she is also seeking something long term.

It doesn't sound like you have been on very many dates yet. You may have to date twenty or thirty more women before you find someone. I know it gets discouraging, but hang in there and eventually it will happen.

Good luck!

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