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came across this at a funnies board, part of 3 posts-nice guys, bad guys and being single; chk all that applies to you :D

I don't agree with some of it, but most of it IS me :rolleyes:
...and yes, it is a generalization, as I'm sure there are women who appreciate nice guys(aren't there?) :D

caution: LOoong post.
=============================
WHY WOMEN HATE NICE GUYS
Nice guys are ugly! They haven't the air of sensuality about them
that bad guys do, because they just haven't had lives. Nice guys
think women are a 'special species' from another planet.

Nice guys suffocate their girlfriends, expecting them to be their
lovers, mother, sister, princess, china doll, and the Goddess who
brings up the sun in their mornings. They also expect their
girlfriends to be their best buddy, because 'real' guys won't have
anything to do with the geeks!

Nice guys sit there entranced by their girlfriends as the girlfriend
carries on the whole conversation by themselves. Nice guys haven't
lived so they have nothing to add to the conversation. Nice guys bore
women to death.

Nice guys stare at their girlfriends in total worship awe. Women find
it difficult to eat when they are being visually consumed by a
staring, mindless dope.

Nice guys quickly look at you when they do a social blunder (such as
fart) to see if you caught it. Who cares!

Nice guys pretend to be 'just our friend' and then go home and
fantasize about us mothering their 'nice guy' kids.

Nice guys have no real life or interest of their own. They sit around
and dream of getting a girlfriend to fill their empty lives.

Nice guys feel so undeserving of 'awesome you' that they make you feel
that you have, most assuredly, picked a real loser.

Nice guys think women are porcelain goddesses. Women don't want to have
to keep living up to a surreal image. If you belch in front of us we
won't break!

Nice guys think that if a woman doesn't want to have anything to do
with their boring, empty shell of manlihood, they're stupid bitches
who would rather be with a jerk that beats them. Yep, this is every
woman's dream.

Nice guys are too STUPID to figure out that woman don't want to be the
leader on the dance floor.

Nice guys wear tucked in golf shirts and make a clean, straight part in
their hair, exactly two-inches above their left ear. This really turns
woman on. So sexy! Why can't Fabio and Brad Pitt take fashion and
grooming lessons from nice guys?

Nice guys sit there like passive puppies, waiting for their girl to
make all the moves. This is because woman love to feel undesirable.

Nice guys can fool our parents. They are often quoted by the respected
elder as being kind, loving, committed. Translation: Gay

Nice guys suck because you can't complain about them to your friends.

Dating a nice guy is like dating yourself. If you like Broccoli, he
likes Broccoli. If you hate Jay Leno, he hates Jay Leno. If you order
a Shirley Temple, he orders a Shirley Temple. If you are pro capital
punishment, he is pro capital punishment. If you think Austin Powers
was disgusting he thinks Austin Powers was disgusting. If you prefer
Kotex over Tampax...

Nice guys eventually turn into jerks too, so why not just date a jerk
right from the start and skip all that insecurity stage?

Nice guys laugh at your jokes...before you've even reached the punchline.

Nice guys quickly get emotionally attached. Sucking the life of you.

Nice guys eagerly show affection. Who can appreciate that of which they
didn't have to work for?

Nice guys are gentle, tender, pedal-soft lovers. Woman love this...
hopefully her nice guy will wake her up to let her know that he is
coming. "I'm not hurting you now, am I hon.?"

Nice guys will never, ever eagerly lust and devour your hot, throbbing
body or steamy, sweetened inner core. Nice guys can't hear your body
screaming, "hold me, touch me, RAVISH me! **** ME NOW!!!"

Hopefully, your nice guy will eventually turn into a jerk and cheat on
you (so someone else can endure his lack of lovemaking skills).

Nice guys will make you feel guilty if you spend a minute anywhere but
with them.

Nice guys will buy you flowers. Then ask you all evening long if you
liked them.

Nice guys will never actually tell their girlfriends when they don't
like what she's doing. Instead, he will get mad about it six months
later.

Nice guys are hideously insecure. Nice guys never do for you anything
for the simple sake of giving. Everything they do for their girlfriends
are like stock investments. The stock is up at Acceptance and Approval.
Each gift he gives you, or loving gesture he shows you, is really a
guaranteed down payment toward a future of him clinging to you like a
drowning man to a life-saver.

Nice guys are confused about romance. They either go overboard and
bring a dozen roses to a "lets go for a walk in the park" date...
or... they are so unsuave and unsure of themselves that they hang
around you, pretending to be your friend. Yep, I just love an
unconfident, self-doubting man.

Nice guys are so desperate to please that they have no identity of
their own. Ask a nice guy his thoughts on anything. Guess what? He
doesn't have any!

Nice guys are easily used. I just love a man I have no respect for.

Nice guys suffer from the "Night in Shining Armor" syndrome. They pick
out the sleaziest, "hard luck" cases to rescue. Moral of the story?
Wear condoms while sleeping thru the sex act with your nice guy.

Nice guys are so eager to please that they rarely speak up when
something bothers them. Thus, they can make their girlfriends feel
guilty when they say, "Everything I did, I did for you".

Nice guys truly think that they are making their girlfriends happy by
sacrificing their own life, desires, wants, needs, opinions, and
identities to that of their girlfriends. They can then claim that "no
one will ever love you as much as I do". Translation: "You are such a
*****, be grateful I'm willing to put up with you and love you anyway."

Nice guys make you their Life, their only source of happiness. Woman
love this burden placed on them.

Nice Guys really don't like themselves. Insecurity is not sexy, it is
suffocating, clinging and obsessive. Issues with nice men are unbearable.
Issues with jerks are workable.

~~Tigress
==================================
I'll post the other 2 if ne1's interested:)
[QUOTE=CoreyP]"Chics like guys that have skills, you Know, like numchuck skills, bowhunting skills, computer hacking skills... Girls only want boyfriends who have great skills"[/QUOTE]

Hahaha!!! :D That must be a line from a movie--sounds awfully familiar. Which movie was that, Corey? Not "Napoleon Dynamite," by any chance, was it?

Matt, you don't have to be a "superman," nor do you have to be a smooth talker to land a girlfriend. I, for one, find it incredibly cute if I think a guy is a bit shy and even somewhat awkward but still had the courage to approach me and say something. Some sweet girl out there might be dying to meet you, you never know! You have to take a chance. The best thing is to just introduce yourself and ask a neutral question. Just tonight, a cute guy on my campus asked me for directions. See, that could have lead to some sort of conversation, easily, although he seemed to really be in need of just directions. But if he had asked me some more questions, like, do I go to this same University, what do I study, etc., I would have been happy to talk with him longer. It's not as difficult as it seems, and sure, there will be some women who are not interested in you, but there's an equal chance of meeting someone who would be thrilled to talk to a guy like you!
Greeneyes's advice is right on, and people would have so much more success with dating if they realized this and acted accordingly rather than sitting around wondering why there are no good single people left out there or why they can't get dates or why they can't meet any appealing people or what's wrong with the world, blah blah blah. No offense but those are all excuses, what people really need to do is stop talking about it and go out and be sociable. Try different ways to meet people, because GE is so right...there's no secret to dating and relationship success, though obviously it helps to be attractive and charismatic. But if you've only tried to go out with two girls in almost a year, that's definitely what your problem is! Dating is a numbers game, and no matter how wonderful or desirable you are, you are going to come across people who just aren't interested in pursuing something with you, no matter how well things seem to have gone. A lot of time it doesn't even have anything to do with you, but if you only pursue two women each year, the odds of you developing a relationship are infintesimal. I suggest giving online dating another try and be a lot more persistent this time around...figure that even the hottest guys out there have to contact at least ten girls to end up with one date, and probably need 3-5 dates to find a woman they get along with well enough to start dating. So it's really just a question of putting yourself out there more, meeting and contacting as many women who appeal to you as you possibly can. Sorry, but it's just totally unrealistic to expect to find a girlfriend at the rate you seem to be pursuing potential partners. If it's important to you to find someone to date exclusively, you have to get out there and start dating A LOT more than you'd think at first! And also, learn not to take rejection personally...9 times out of 10 when something happens like you described, it really doesn't have anything to do with you. For all you know, the girl could have accepted your number to be polite and avoid having to say no even if she had a boyfriend, or the other girl could have gotten exclusive with someone else just when you started talking with her. There are a million reasons why it wouldn't work out with any given woman, which is why you need to take any rejection in stride and not let it bother you as if it was a personal reflection on you. It's just not true that most rejections are personal, but if you continue to think your lack of success is because there's something lacking in you, that insecurity will come across to women and be perceived as unappealing. No guy has a 100% or even a 50% success rate when it comes to female prospects during into dates, let alone girlfriends! So get back on your horse and stop taking rejection personally...you need a thicker skin and to just keep putting yourself out there over and over until you succeed. Like anything, dating gets easier and more successful with practice, concerted effort, determination, and a positive attitude.

PS--Corey, I love your posts and your sense of humor! And I love Napoleon Dynamite! What you guys really need to do is draw these ladies pictures of themselves...or ligers, lol. Anyway, Corey, you give great advice. And I'm with Sophia...even though I've always had quite a lot of guys of all types pursuing me, I tend to go for the sweet, funny, nerdy, and really brilliant ones. So don't give up...there are lots of girls like Sophia (and me, who might hook up with really hot jocks for fun but) who would only consider a cute, nice, nerdy smart guy for a relationship.
[QUOTE=knotme]came across this at a funnies board, part of 3 posts-nice guys, bad guys and being single; chk all that applies to you :D

I don't agree with some of it, but most of it IS me :rolleyes:
...and yes, it is a generalization, as I'm sure there are women who appreciate nice guys(aren't there?) :D

caution: LOoong post.
=============================
WHY WOMEN HATE NICE GUYS
Nice guys are ugly! They haven't the air of sensuality about them
that bad guys do, because they just haven't had lives. Nice guys
think women are a 'special species' from another planet.

Nice guys suffocate their girlfriends, expecting them to be their
lovers, mother, sister, princess, china doll, and the Goddess who
brings up the sun in their mornings. They also expect their
girlfriends to be their best buddy, because 'real' guys won't have
anything to do with the geeks!

Nice guys sit there entranced by their girlfriends as the girlfriend
carries on the whole conversation by themselves. Nice guys haven't
lived so they have nothing to add to the conversation. Nice guys bore
women to death.

Nice guys stare at their girlfriends in total worship awe. Women find
it difficult to eat when they are being visually consumed by a
staring, mindless dope.

Nice guys quickly look at you when they do a social blunder (such as
fart) to see if you caught it. Who cares!

Nice guys pretend to be 'just our friend' and then go home and
fantasize about us mothering their 'nice guy' kids.

Nice guys have no real life or interest of their own. They sit around
and dream of getting a girlfriend to fill their empty lives.

Nice guys feel so undeserving of 'awesome you' that they make you feel
that you have, most assuredly, picked a real loser.

Nice guys think women are porcelain goddesses. Women don't want to have
to keep living up to a surreal image. If you belch in front of us we
won't break!

Nice guys think that if a woman doesn't want to have anything to do
with their boring, empty shell of manlihood, they're stupid bitches
who would rather be with a jerk that beats them. Yep, this is every
woman's dream.

Nice guys are too STUPID to figure out that woman don't want to be the
leader on the dance floor.

Nice guys wear tucked in golf shirts and make a clean, straight part in
their hair, exactly two-inches above their left ear. This really turns
woman on. So sexy! Why can't Fabio and Brad Pitt take fashion and
grooming lessons from nice guys?

Nice guys sit there like passive puppies, waiting for their girl to
make all the moves. This is because woman love to feel undesirable.

Nice guys can fool our parents. They are often quoted by the respected
elder as being kind, loving, committed. Translation: Gay

Nice guys suck because you can't complain about them to your friends.

Dating a nice guy is like dating yourself. If you like Broccoli, he
likes Broccoli. If you hate Jay Leno, he hates Jay Leno. If you order
a Shirley Temple, he orders a Shirley Temple. If you are pro capital
punishment, he is pro capital punishment. If you think Austin Powers
was disgusting he thinks Austin Powers was disgusting. If you prefer
Kotex over Tampax...

Nice guys eventually turn into jerks too, so why not just date a jerk
right from the start and skip all that insecurity stage?

Nice guys laugh at your jokes...before you've even reached the punchline.

Nice guys quickly get emotionally attached. Sucking the life of you.

Nice guys eagerly show affection. Who can appreciate that of which they
didn't have to work for?

Nice guys are gentle, tender, pedal-soft lovers. Woman love this...
hopefully her nice guy will wake her up to let her know that he is
coming. "I'm not hurting you now, am I hon.?"

Nice guys will never, ever eagerly lust and devour your hot, throbbing
body or steamy, sweetened inner core. Nice guys can't hear your body
screaming, "hold me, touch me, RAVISH me! **** ME NOW!!!"

Hopefully, your nice guy will eventually turn into a jerk and cheat on
you (so someone else can endure his lack of lovemaking skills).

Nice guys will make you feel guilty if you spend a minute anywhere but
with them.

Nice guys will buy you flowers. Then ask you all evening long if you
liked them.

Nice guys will never actually tell their girlfriends when they don't
like what she's doing. Instead, he will get mad about it six months
later.

Nice guys are hideously insecure. Nice guys never do for you anything
for the simple sake of giving. Everything they do for their girlfriends
are like stock investments. The stock is up at Acceptance and Approval.
Each gift he gives you, or loving gesture he shows you, is really a
guaranteed down payment toward a future of him clinging to you like a
drowning man to a life-saver.

Nice guys are confused about romance. They either go overboard and
bring a dozen roses to a "lets go for a walk in the park" date...
or... they are so unsuave and unsure of themselves that they hang
around you, pretending to be your friend. Yep, I just love an
unconfident, self-doubting man.

Nice guys are so desperate to please that they have no identity of
their own. Ask a nice guy his thoughts on anything. Guess what? He
doesn't have any!

Nice guys are easily used. I just love a man I have no respect for.

Nice guys suffer from the "Night in Shining Armor" syndrome. They pick
out the sleaziest, "hard luck" cases to rescue. Moral of the story?
Wear condoms while sleeping thru the sex act with your nice guy.

Nice guys are so eager to please that they rarely speak up when
something bothers them. Thus, they can make their girlfriends feel
guilty when they say, "Everything I did, I did for you".

Nice guys truly think that they are making their girlfriends happy by
sacrificing their own life, desires, wants, needs, opinions, and
identities to that of their girlfriends. They can then claim that "no
one will ever love you as much as I do". Translation: "You are such a
*****, be grateful I'm willing to put up with you and love you anyway."

Nice guys make you their Life, their only source of happiness. Woman
love this burden placed on them.

Nice Guys really don't like themselves. Insecurity is not sexy, it is
suffocating, clinging and obsessive. Issues with nice men are unbearable.
Issues with jerks are workable.

~~Tigress
==================================
I'll post the other 2 if ne1's interested:)[/QUOTE]

i'm interested in the other 2
[QUOTE=mada_3083]i'm interested in the other 2[/QUOTE]
dude, none of that is true, at least for me. [B]i consider myself a nice guy and NONE, absolutely NONE of that describes me[/B].

i consider myself a nice guy because simply because i respect women and treat them well. i've even rescued women i don't even know on numerous occasions from jerks while on the dance floor (women trust me even though they don't know me for some reason). not all nice guys will smother you; i won't. i have a life and i'd want her to have one too.





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