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Relationship Health Message Board

Relationship Health Board Index

Your girlfriend is the same age as I am, so I can tell you that it's not at all surprising that she wants to get married, even if she isn't sure about having more children. And now, of course, after "playing house" for a couple of months, her desire to get married got even stronger. It's like having a carrot dangling in your face but not being allowed to touch it. If you say you're in love and your relationship is good, I don't understand how the thought of marriage has never crossed your mind after dating for 1.5 yrs? I mean, what is your goal in dating then? To me, dating is a process to find that one person who can hopefully become my life partner, so if the other person just wants to date for the sake of dating without any potential for a future together, I don't see a point in it. Dating is not the same as being married to someone; you can date tons of people, but unless you're a hollywood star, most people only marry one or two partners in their lifetime. The implication is that you marry only that special someone whom you cannot imagine yourself living without, so I guess your gf must interpret your reluctance as not being "good enough" or "special enough" for you to make her your wife and that makes her feel down. I think it's unfair to keep her in a going-nowhere relationship if marriage is important to her. I think after 2 years of dating you should know. If you still don't know in the next several months, you will probably never know. If you keep dating her for a few more years and then break up, she will be in her late 30s and back into square one. I don't envy her position, while you as a guy in his late 30s will still have lots of options.

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