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Relationship Health Message Board

Relationship Health Board Index

I've been with my boyfriend for 4 months. When we met, our lives instantly changed. We felt like we had finally found each other, and we fell in love VERY quickly. 2 days felt like 2 months... one week felt like one year. I feel like I've known him forever.
In 2 days, I will be officially moved in with him. Most of my stuff is already there, but we're moving the big things on Friday. We had been talking about moving in, getting married, etc... since about our one week anniversary, so this is no huge shock for me. We set the official date back in August and I thought that would give me plenty of time to adjust to the idea of living with him. I've never lived with a boyfriend before. During my single-period before I met my boyfriend, I had envisioned all sorts of different versions of my life. I imagined living alone in a ranch on a farm down south... I imagined a log cabin in the mountains... I just got hooked on the idea of living independently and alone. It became something I wanted! When I met my boyfriend, I knew I wanted him above everything else in the world. So it would just be a matter of adjusting some ideas in my head and letting go of some of those visions I had. I thought a month and a half would be plenty of time. But I'm panicked now. Absolutely sickened with panic.
I am so scared he's going to mistreat me in the future. I'm scared he's going to lie to me or something. And I will be "stuck" with no where to go. It will be so much harder to break up with him. I'm used to being able to dump a guy if he tells me a lie. Now I don't have that anymore! I can't just up and leave anytime! And although I know I love him and want to be with him forever, I just don't know if I'm 100% sure! And living together might as well be marriage as far as I'm concerned because it leaves me with limited getaway power.
He is going to give me a ring, we are going to get married, all that. I know he loves me and I know I love him. I think I'm just experiencing the cold feet like people get before a wedding. I'm getting it before moving in. Has anyone been through this panic feeling and come out fine on the other side? Does anyone know how I can calm myself? I don't want to talk to him about it because I don't want him thinking I'm having second thoughts. I'm really not... at least I don't think I am. My brain just isn't working. I'm not typing well and I've been running into walls all day. I'm so stressed and panicked I don't know how much longer I can take this.
Can anyone give any words of encouragement to relieve this?

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