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Relationship Health Message Board

Relationship Health Board Index

You can give up on this guy as some have suggested. It is up to you. If you do, the ex and his mom will succeed in accomplishing what they set out to do. They will do the same thing with any other girl he meets next. That doesn’t seem like a solution to the real problem here.

What do you two argue about? What do you have to argue about? The problem seems to be between him, his mum and his ex. Apart from you being with him, why do you want to be part of his family? You are really only talking about one person here… his mom. His ex will be in the picture, but she will be in the background with the only link between her and him would be their child.

I don’t see any reason in your post on why he shouldn’t be allowed to see his son. I hate it when people use their kids as pawns to get the ex to do what they want them to do or from doing what they don’t want them to do. That is a very selfish act that doesn’t benefit the child. It’s a real cheap shot to show him photos of his son who he is not allowed to see in person. It’s unfortunate but sometimes it takes a court order to make them comply.

Your boyfriend really needs to do something other than just complain to you. You shouldn’t be his constant source on who to unload his baggage about not being able to see his son. He needs to be more assertive. Your boyfriend needs to buy himself some new pants that ride lower in the crotch and won’t restrict his movement. He needs to “throw momma from the train.” Preferably when it is moving. Most important, he needs to establish his parental rights and make it clear that he should be allowed to visit his son or take it to court no matter who he offends along the way. If his son means that much to him, offending his mother should be the least of his concerns. After all, it is for the benefit of his son and isn’t that what everyone is concerned about. It doesn't surprise me how they don’t see that part of the solution.

Forget the mom, forget the ex…well as much as you are able to. You shouldn’t have to talk to either one of them if you don’t want, unless you think it will help your boyfriend see his son. You should be encouraging him to step up his efforts to do what he has to do to see his son even if it means taking it to court. Also, your cell phone has caller ID. If you recognize that the ex is calling, just don’t answer it. If you do answer it, tell her he is not available. Be nice and don’t aggravate the situation anymore than it already is. Also, don’t let her know that she is getting to you both, otherwise it will just encourage her more. The same goes for momma.


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