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Relationship Health Message Board


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Please men answer this for me:

I have been with my b/f for over a year now. We are monogamous, emotionally and physically, and have a great relationship.
I knew coming into the relationship that my b/f had a best friend and the two men were really close. I had no problem with that and still don't have a problem with that. I never would want to come between the men. In fact, our individual groups of friends have no problem hanging out together.

But can someone please explain this in terms that I can understand.

My b/f works the third shift 11pm-7am and 3pm-11pm on saturdays. I spend the night on the weekends so that we can see each other and spend time. I spent the night Friday and stayed in his apartment while he went to work on Sat. A usual occurrence. My b/f's brother had come over to get some clothes or something. No biggie right.
Then my b/f's best friend came over to pick up his brother and the two went out. I was in the bedroom. Best friend bursts unexpectedly into the bedroom. I know that he knew I was there because my car was outside. Fortunately I was dressed. When I made the comment that he should have knocked, he said "why, you don't live here". Anyway, they left. Then they came back. The brother does some stuff and then he leaves. Best friend and I are in the apartment.
I was really uncomfortable because Best Friend begins to talk to me about his personal finances and goals and stuff. Then he received a phone call and left.
Fast forward, my b/f comes home and we are watching a movie. And would you believe the Best Friend comes back!!! Best Friend ends up staying at the apartment with us until after 1am.

What in the world, folks? I understand guys and their friends and the BOND and everything but don't guys get the girlfriend factor. I asked my b/f if they had plans for Sat night or something. He said no that his best friend just likes to come over sometime and hang out.

Fellas, is this normal? Am I overreacting? Because I feel like some boundaries have been crossed. I am not mad, but I don't want this to happen again. What can I say to my b/f without sounding like "choose me over your best friend" girl?





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