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Relationship Health Message Board

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Hi everone it is nice to be able to have someplace to go and vent! I just recently broke up with my longtime boyfriend, I am having so many emotions about it ,seems very strange. One day I am happy to be away from him and the next day I feel like I just want to call him even though I know this would be the stupidest thing to do. I don't like talking to my friends or co-workers b/c I don't really want to burden others with my problems but it is just a very lonly time for me. I try to fill my time up as much as possible,but after being in such a long relationship it's hard and I miss him.I still haven't gotten all of my things from his home and I don't want to go over there because I am afraid I will stay! I am very flustrated with him,myself, and this whole situation! I love him very much but after seven years I want to either progress on in this relationship or end it. I just feel put upon ,and like he doesnt respect me enough or consider me good enough to marry. He was married before and he married his first wife within 1 or two years of I have decided it must not be a commitment problem.I know every situation is different and ours is uniqe but why do you suppose he has treated me this way? We have lived as a couple, he doesn't want me with anyone else, and even gets jealous of the very few friends I do have.I think this may be a bad thing but haven't really bothered over it much because I am not a real social person and have enjoyed our home life.I just do not get why he has nt married me we lived as a real family,but I know deep down we are not! I am very hurt and confused, he has never given me a real reason. I have ask but feel very uncomfortable doing so. My thoughts are that he doesn't want to marry me because he has a kid with his x wife that may be jealous even though she has very little to do with him or us,I also have a daughter the same age as his and she is fine, he has basically raised her since she was 3 years old and is the strongest male figure in her life.I cannot help but think that I may be setting a bad example for her as to marrage and all, or maybe leading her to believe that it is okay to be some mans lifetime girlfriend with never any real commitment is normal.I feel very insulted to say the least and very hurt as well as a little ashamed of myself for being there as long as I was.Does any of this make sence to any of you? I would like to hear a little advice from you guys on your take on the situation, sometimes when you are in the mist of something things get a little foggy from your own emotions and you can't quite get a clear picture.I really apprieciate you taking the time to read my post and reply to it. Thankx,Tiff

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