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Relationship Health Message Board


Relationship Health Board Index


Hello Guys and Gals-

I am normally on the thyroid board discussing my goofy thyroid and was browsing and happened to see this post and just wanted to add my story.

I will make this as short as possible- I am happily married for 6 years and two beautiful daughters later something just happened to me and I just can't stop thinking about it. I was around 19 (33 now) and I met a guy named Terry. It was at a bowling alley when I was out with my girlfriends and we talked and that was it. We went on a date and I was captivated by him (and his convertable mustang). We fell in love very quickly and our relationship turned unhealthy about 2 years into it. Anyway we stuck it out for 4 more years lived together, got engaged and then ended things on mutual terms.

About 6 months after the breakup he became involved with another women. I knew her but we were not really friends as she and him worked together. So I played the field dating several different people and Terry and I talked on occasion but we were better apart. It was very hard for both of us but we both managed to move on. Then his girlfriend got pregnant. Every feeling I had for him went down the tubes. They were both estatic about the news so I think I went on the hunt for a partner.

I had this guy friend that I partied with and just hung out with. He was seperated from his wife (she had cheated on him) so we remained friends as I was afraid to get involved with him (until he was divorced)and getting hurt. I couldn't emotionally take a breakup like the previous one .Shortley after his divorce I called him and told him I was ready to give us a chance and within a year we were engaged and a year later we were married. I knew at that very moment that I was ready to try another serious relationship that we would be partners for life. I believe it still to this day.

O.k. so the years have passed and I am truely content in my marriage.

We some how ALL became this circle of friends. My husband, Terry, his wife and myself. Very close friends. I rejoiced the day she gave birth to her daughter and was truely happy for both of them.

So here we are happy and friends. The phonecall came 4 weeks ago this Saturday. Terry died very suddenly. They are not sure if it was his heart or what- We are waiting on autopsy results-

The reason I wanted to post here is because I don't think you ever get over that love. No I was not in love with him anymore but I did love him very much. I love his wife as a sister and she is expecting a son any day now. There were so many things I never said to him that I wanted to and I regret so much never telling him how much I did love him and just wanted nothing but happiness for him and his wife. I miss him and I ache inside knowing I will meet his son very soon. Is this normal- I mean to feel this way over an ex that is married and with be me being married? I don't know if it is or not but I am hurting so bad inside. I think much worse than when we broke up.

Sorry this is so long. It seemed I really didn't know where to put this post but I just don't think that love for him will ever die. Even dying with him.

Nikki





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