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:wave: Good news ! I feel wonderful this morning !..

My daughter rang , and after talking about a request she asked her father to do , which I knew he would not be happy about , we spoke quite openly about the way he is , how rude he is at times to her husband (our son in law ) then slowly , but slowly it all came out !! I had no intentions of saying anything , but she began it first !!

Before I even mentioned another woman, she was saying how her and her husband were just talking 2 nights ago , saying they would not be surprised if I didn't leave him .. they know what he's like to me , so selfish , how he won't move from here for me , to have a better life etc.. ( as I've written in my above posts .. ) and I eventually said , there is more happening".. and i quietly said , i believe another woman...

She said , I wondered that!! Why he wouldn't come for meals at night when you were in hospital 22 days Mum?.. He has stopped coming up like he used to after work to see the kids , .. ( that's when he goes to visit this woman at her work , )
So then i had the Go Light to tell her honestly what i am doing , , the Private Investigators etc.. and she just kept saying , it doesn't surprise me Mum.. his nature , etc..
She even guessed the area where we believe the woman lives .... " so that's why he takes the dogs for their walks over there every night , it makes sense ! !!
I explained i don't hate him , don't want to make her choose between us as parents , but i said I thought i needed concrete proof to show her if he is doing this affair , so she wouldn't blame me .. and hate me, think I'm awful .. She said " No mUM.. I know what he's like , how he treats you , we wanted to get you out of there but didn't know how to help you , .. I said , i can do it , I just needed to know in my heart you wouldn't hate me , what ever i do . .. Out of anyone , You and the 2 little ones mean more to me than anyone , I need you there in my life ,
Then i told her , last year , when things were getting so stressful , I felt like killing myself , but the only thing that made me say don't do it , was the thought .. " my daughter , and wee g/children , later on in their lives , would think " how could nanna have done that to us ..?"

My daughter had gone very quiet when I said this , and I realised she was quietly crying , she couldn;'t speak , .. but I told her ..
"I love you sweetheart , ! I am ok now , I am getting help to move with all the disability people , and she offered to even find a flat for me close to her ! .. i was so amazed she'd tink to do that ..
She also said at one point , she knows I'd offered her father to go to other women if he wasn't happy , like protitutes, but to be honest about it and tell me , yet said he didn't need that .. She siad , well , a one off fling , a person can be forgiven for , but he's not going to have any damned family at all , if he is having an affair mum .. doing that to you , when you've been so good to him!"
She KNOWS what i've done for him all my life , devoted myself entirely !.. been 100 % faithful always , never even thought or looked at another man , as I wanted it to work , tried to get him to go to counselling , cos I knew he had problems of relating to love, to make us happier , but he didn't want to go... I tried everything to make it work , he didn't . Now my disability has been the catalyst to break us up; maybe that is what was meant to happen.. ?.. Well , the PIs' will be looking out on the 27th 28th and we'll see if it all comes out .. But now I am at peace , cos i know , my daughter understands when I leave her father , why and she's going to not turn her back on me.. and that is all I need now to give me the faith to go on and take the steps I need to do. My husband , well inher words , " He can go live with his pighunting mates , and go hunting everyday for the rest of his life !

"Want's his cake and eat it too !" ...meaning comfort and this house , plus " the other woman on the side !"..

as I said , "I just want nothing more for him than to be HAPPY!! "
Everyone knows that of me .
But I couldn't be the one to do that for him..

maybe it's also losing his half of the business to me , half the house , etc.. that could be why he doesn't/didn't want to get help and admit we have a problem ?..
well , I have to begin a new life of Hope for myself ..

So there everyone , I have achieved this morning all I want .. to know my daughter will just be there and still love me no matter what happens .. I am so happy !!!!

Thanks for your posts of encouragement .. I'll still pursue the PIs' just for the interesting perspective to confront him if anything , and since they've been paid , but , I am happy with the outcome already !....

Will keep in touch later , if more happens .. Yours , nanna :angel: xxxx

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