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Relationship Health Message Board

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Poor you, at least I can drink...Well congrats on your recovery.I can see what the problem may be with you though.I don't know where you met her but I've always heard that romantic relationships thru recovery is never a good idea,I am not sure what the reason behind this is but thats just what I have heard that the relationships don't last but hummm 5 years I guess thats good. Maybe you just started depending on her more than on yourself. Maybe you can set little goals for yourself like "I will not call her for xx amount of days " and then reward yourself somehow(not with a drink) lol but someway!
I think what bothers me the most is him getting with someone else. He is planning a trip to his country soon and I just feel like maybe he will hook up with someone who needs a greencard and bring them back here. He is not good looking (at all) He is in bad health(recovering from stage 4 cancer) but I stuck by him through all of this even though he treated me the worse when I was a live in nurse to him basically! I know women are definatly not throwing themselves on him okay...but if he went back to his country and came back with a wife...after seven years with me and no marriage,I would be absolutly devestated!!! Men are really stupid if a women shows them a little attention and hey he would have someone his own race and culture (asian) so it may be my imagination but it isn't to far fetched. Maybe it is but I just thought of it other than that I am ready to be rid of him.I love him but god I am not in love with him and what I mostly feel for him is resentment more than anything! I feel like I have wasted alot of my life with him.
So, this is like day 2 for you not talking to her? I meant to tell him last night but It never seemed like the right time...and he always has some string that keeps me around.
The latest is that he is trying to by a condo and he wants me to help him get it. Of course I will not even be making money off him but I just feel like I should help him and he always has friends who need help and he uses this to keep contact. I guess.
I think it will be easy after I help him. My brother just moved bak in with me last night. He hates it when my bro. is here because he doesn't feel safe knowing that I have a babysitter and I can go out anytime I want to,he is really P.O. now. Plus I am going to start a new job at a new bigger company this week he always felt safe because I worked for a gay guy before in a small family owned he is not happy about that either but I feel like I have a good chance to start get a new lease on life now. I decided to go take some salsa danceing lessons with a friend of mine and now that my bro. is here I will be able to. I think in no time I will be over him. It will be so much easier now. I will just have a talk with him tonight. Humm! How do you bring up the subject? I mean, he always makes me feel like I am starting a fight when I want to talk about "the relationship" he says it isn't the right time and he either changes the suject or walks away if I pursue it...How did you bring it up,how did you start the conversation? I know I need to do this,the sooner the better...I am really ready now. I think it has to be know that I have someone here with me and the lonliness will not be so much of an issue. Take it easy and hang in there ....DO NOT CALL...LOL

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