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Being threatened
Mar 21, 2006
I was threatened over telephone by a Friend's Son this afternoon.I owe her Money and haven't paid it back yet as I had to square away and take care of some personal business of my own first.If I owe People money I'm good on my word and repay what I owe.I may not pay it all back at once or punctually but I do get business taken care of..This Family is a very defensive sort of People and drama drama drama filled..I don't like how controlling the Son is with my Friend.He forgets she is the Mother and he is the Son..There have been numerous times in past he and his Wife had to take care of her affairs but he continues when she doesn't need his help.He needs to be more concerned with his Sister who swipes her checkbook and writes hundreds of dollars checks forging her name and charging items on her credit card and his Wife who writes hot checks left and right constantly than worrying about the business I have with her..I don't appreciate being threatened..he put me on the defensive and I sat there and bit my tongue cos I came real close biting back..I'm not sure what to say to my Friend because she tends to come across as defensive herself but she sees me as a Sister so I don't imagine she will appreciate he threatening me especially when no one was around..he needs anger management courses and Therapy to get over childhood issues..
Donít hide this from your friend, other wise it could build up and be more of a problem. Have a chat with her and let her know what her son said to you. If she goes against you Ė well you have your answer right there.
Do whatever you can do to pay this woman back and don't borrow money from her anymore. There's another thread going right now about someone who's friend isn't paying her back and she's desperate for the money. Do you stop and think that she needs the money as much as you need it and it's rightfully hers? IMHO, friends should never let friends borrow money!
My husband and I do lend money to certain friends once in a while BUT we know they will have the money to pay back and will do so soon which is how we do if we borrow from a friend we pay it back if we do not think we will be able to pay it back within a reasonable amount of time then we do not go to a friend to borrow money.I agree on paying her back as soon as possible and dont borrow money from her again
At the end of the day if the friendship is really genuinely strong I donít see why money should get in the way of a tresureable friendship. Itís a very easy mistake to get into and when no one else is willing to help bad situations become blind when someone is offering to help.
I just told my Friend over Telephone what her Son did to me..she didn't defend me she sided with him cos he is her Son..one thing about me I don't like confrontation and it isn't my nature to attack anyone but I will stand up for myself and the ones I love when they are wronged or hurt but she didn't me after I have her several times..I did just the other day with her Boyfriend..really her Son had no right..she paid him the money he and his Wife paid towards the bill so I owe her not him..he needs to stop meddling in her affairs and he definitely needs to stop bowing that Chest out and getting defensive especially to a Woman..he is gonna do it to the wrong Person one of these days and will wind up in the smelly stuff..my Dad will not tolerate him threatening me..I can see now what kind of Friend she is..I will never again help her when she gets in binds no matter what it is nor will I defend her..I was just about sick of her drama anyway..she is 52 she passed the age of 12 years ago(can't get past childhood issues)..
52 and still with this attitude? Thatís really sad!!
I owe it to her I'm well aware of that and I will repay every last cent I owe her I just had to get my business taken care of beforehand..Oh I won't ask her for anything else..it's strange to me she is letting an old Friend of her's who has ripped her off in past that got in trouble with the law and her shack up who is married to another Woman(and still with her)with a teenage Son who is being shipped off tomorrow for another stint in Prison live there eating her out of house and home,not helping with bills and the like but I'm threatened when she has already covered the bill and I owe her not the Son..I have been very good to her especially the past year..she has been gravely ill,her Father has been ill,she had problems with her Boyfriend,problems with her Brother and problems with the Son and I stood by her and defended her but she wouldn't me..
Crystal she got married 1 day after she graduated High School and was pregnant within no time..the first night she was married her ex Husband wrapped a clothes hanger around her neck and made her know who wore the pants..she stayed with him almost 30 years..the length of their marriage she was on and off emotionally and physically abused but wouldn't leave..she married her second Husband who is now deceased before she divorced her first Husband..then went back to him once when she and the second Husband were having problems..just the other day she sent some naked photo's of herself via email to a Male Friend she met at work..they developed feelings for one another but the relationship didn't progress..she has a Boyfriend currently..as a Child she was sexually molested by a Man in her Family and never told anyone..yes she has been through some rough times but she chose to stay in the marriage knowing the situation wouldn't change..she wants People to pity her and the drama outdoes any Soap on daytime Television by a long shot..
You know what I say? You donít need people like that! I have a friend that also loves drama and I loved her she meant so much to me and lately she has hurt me so much that I have just completely shut off. I thought why should I speak to her when I do she always says hurtful things and things to purposely get under my skin! From me thinking I cant live without her and I need her has now turned into I donít want to talk to you anymore. Im a lot happier now, no more head fu#ks! I dread seeing an sms from her now cause its like ďyeh give it to me wat mean thing do u have to say nowĒ and its not like I havenít been open with her I told her shes being a bit#h and all that and she promised me she wont anymoreÖ.YEH RIGHT! Seriously I can go on about this for hours lol. Try and not socialise with her. You can still pay her back without all the headaches.
WOW! I agree you dont need all that mess and drama especialy with her attitude and that son of hers.Ya know I dont understand why some people are that way hub has a friend who has been messed over so many times by this one guy when he has loaned him money and things this guy NEVER pays back and swindles his way through life is WELL known for this and still hubs buds will keep giving him money and then crying when he never gets paid back doesnt make much sense.My husband and I loaned this same guy some money to pay his mortgage and things years back never got paid back so we have never loaned him anything since.
Just do what ya have to to pay her back and I wouldnt continue with her no more after that.
Pay the woman her money. :nono: You should have paid it back, then her son would not have called you. I am sure she knows that he called you. Do not be mad at them, for trying to get you to pay up. When you borrow money you should pay it back as you agreed. Whrn we let people borrow money we would like to think they will pay it back when they promised. We are sorry if things come up, but you made a promised and we need are money back. :D
Hmmm excuse me Shanlo I WILL repay her when I get MY business squared away.I DO repay if I borrow money..Really it's none of her Son's business.He and his Wife paid the bill and she repaid them so I owe her not them..that is what I mean he sticks his nose to far in her business.
Crystal,
It's drama all the way with these People..just like night before last her Daughter she adopted claimed to be raped the other night by this IV Drug user who has been in Prison..no going to Police or Hospital..no evidence..no suspect..supposedly this is the second time she has been raped..the Daughter is a Lesbian nothing wrong in her sexual preference and is ghetto..she has lived on the Streets in a major Metropolitan City but now lives in this big house with tons of People..instead of walking into a room to discuss whatever with whoever they text each other..anyway my Friend and another Friend of her's went to the City where the Daughter lives to the Police Department..my Friend(the Mother)said she told the Police Officer she would find him herself and kill him..she told me he said I'll turn my head..that Family is all the time saying if anyone wrongs them they will have them done away with and get off the hook..the reason her Son is the way he is is because she wouldn't leave his Father for the abuse he witnessed growing up..he is very suspicious of everyone,non-rusting and is on the defensive constantly..I don't know how his Wife or anyone tolerates him..the adopted Daughter steals her Mother blind,calls her nasty names and is not helpful..very self-centered..I'm really surprised anyone believed this rape she has cried Wolf so much..I don't care to involve myself in such behaviors..
I don't understand why it is but it always seems like when someone borrows money and they don't pay it back, it's somehow the person that wants the money back that's accused of being the bad guy? My BF loaned his ex and her BF a lot of money and they pay him a few bucks a month I guess just so it will look like they are doing something....then one day they wanted to borrow another $550 from him! He said he couldn't do it because they still owe him money and you would have thought my BF was the most horrible B*****D that ever lived because he wouldn't "give" them money which it what it would have ended up being is he would never have seen that money back again. It's not OK to just give someone their money a few dollars when it's convenient with you. Another thing...we see them buying their beer and cigarettes with no problem but they can't pay him the $200 they still owe him. It's maddening! He'd be happy with $10 a month but nothing comes? Not even a dollar last month!!!!! :nono:
Tnmom,
I will repay her what I owe I have to get banking matters and bills taken care of first..my Friend knows I have it rough at times and she also knows I will pay her back..like I have said it isn't any of her Son's business..he takes it upon himself to stick his nose where it doesn't belong..
ILYF,
The only reason I'm upset is her Son threatened me when he isn't the Person I owe.Even if I owed him he still shouldn't threaten me.
So, this thread is over a week old, but I couldn't help but comment. Borrowing money among friends is a very bad idea. As you probably know. My guess is that your friend didnt have the heart to ask you for the money back, and maybe she hadn't hear from you on the status of your repayment... Its hard for friends to confront friends in money issues, because obviously someone gets hurt. So, she's been complaining about it to listening ears.. obviously her sons, and thats probably why he called. Hes tired of hearing her complain. Its also possible that when you asked for money, this woman gave it to you, and then found herself in a financial jam... then asked her son for money. Most likely you dont know the whole situation on their end. But regardless, if you paid for the thing you initially borrowed money for, then you need to pay her back immediately. She lent you money for a purpose, not for a puropose plus 5. Maybe it would help if you called her, and said, "I'm working on paying you back, its been a littler harder than I thought, and I'm sorry." and then suggest that you work out a payment plan. Paying small chunks at a time are easier than a huge lump sum, but you have to really stick to the plan.... its now one of your bills. I think this will send some relief in your friend's direction. Lastly, if her son calls, you need to remember that it is your friend's family. He's just looking out for his mom, and you are in debt to her. Be polite, bite your tounge. You must discuss this with your friend.





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