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[QUOTE=Shanlo]The very thing that you fear is what will come upon you. First, forgive him so that you can move on. You have to know that you can make it without a man in your life. People are only a temporary fix, nothing permnanet. You are the only one that can make you happy. Happiness comes from inside, not from people, places or things. You will attract people in life, that best fit the way you think about yourself. If you want to be more positive about life then hang with people who are positive. IF you speak negative things you will attract just that. You can do things on your own. Take a cruise with a girlfriend. You do not need a man to make you feel complete, whole, you are only whole in God. Man is human, he makes mistakes do stupid things, cannot be trusted, IT HAPPENS AND YOU HAV TO REALIZE IT IS NOT THAT DEEP. Do something different with your life. Save your money and buy beautiful furniture, a new car or just be DEBT FREE. Be your own woman until the right man comes along and want you for a wife not just for a lay. You need to know what kind of man you want, what do you want in the future. Decide. Then do something about it; if you want another boyfriend just so you will not be lonely then you need to do a lot of inner spirit searching. If you do not have standards then you will fall for anything, women often just want a man because they are lonely, and that man will be with them and never marry them. So if you want to attact the right man then do something different with your life. Learn the real you. Tell yourself that you are beautiful and fearfully made. :bouncing: :bouncing:[/QUOTE]

what an inspiring post...:) all the posts on this board have been great...

citygirl-
its been four months since my breakup and im still hurting bad and i coujld even say that im still in love with my ex- are you still in love with yours? its weird because ive lost so much respect for him and i feel so sick when i think of him and the things he did, but i still feel for him, im still trying to come to terms with that
...i understand you. im still going through rollercoasters...it isnt nice, is it? even when i try so hard to think or feel a certain way, it doesnt help, i realy cant control my thoughts or emotions and it really gets me down sometimes
my outlook too has been corrupted...but i do see hope...i see that i will one day meet the right guy, that there is someone better out there for me, as there is for you...i really WANTED my ex to be the one, but he wasnt. the same with yours. we believed these guys were the ones for us, but it reall;y wasnt the case...we fell in love with the wrong guy...im sure if we made a list of our perfect mr right and compared the list to a list of our exs, we would agree that they werent the ones for us- this way of thinking has helped me gain hope but it doesnt really help with my pain/ anger- it may help with yours.
in my opinion, i think you should stop seeing that friends with benefits guy- i too think that it hurts you maybe you dont realise? i think it teases you? ive been wanting to get together with someone else or start seeing someone for fun but ive really tried hard and resisted- yeah, i mean, itd be fun, and itd distract me, but for me, itll just show me how incomplete i feel because im with the wrong guy and this will nly emphasise it even more- id get more upset/ angry/ frustrated- by being with someone who you dont love and doesnt love you...i wasnt ready untill now to want to be with someone else and i dont think youre ready- maybe you are- but this isnt the right guy. i think you should stop seeing this guy, and really be on your own, stay single and dont see anyone as a friend with extra benefits- untill you meet the RIGHT guy and i wont lie but this may take time because as gypsy said- people in our kinda situations are left more suspicious, picky and demanding etc...
are you still going therapy, may i ask? hows it going?

goodluck hun x x x





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