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Relationship Health Message Board

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I have never been in such a difficult situation in my life. I met up with an old high school friend (male) no more then a month ago, we went out, did a lot of things, etc etc... Mean while, I've told my ex boyfriend EVERYTHING, I never left anything out. I told him about how my friend was coming onto me a lot, and everything. All he ever said was "well maybe you shouldn't see him anymore." But, I liked his friendship, so I kept giving him chances. Some background, by ex boyfriend and I have had A WONDERFUL relationship, did the whole long distance thing, and now he's back. We've been together 9 months. So, I was confused that maybe I was getting feelings for my friend, but NOW I know that I just realy wanted a close friend. He wanted other things. I told my ex boyfriend that we should go on a small break from eachother so I could figure things out. I did, I was going to get rid of my friend, but instead we slept together. I told my ex boyfriend, and he was SO UPSET... he considers it cheating, even though technically we were on a break. And to me, it feels like cheating too. All of this has happend about a week ago. My ex boyfriend (yeah, he broke up with me) was just so upset, and he hasn't hardly talk to me since, and feels like we could never go back to our relationship. Even though I feel/ and have told him that what I did with the friend was a mistake, and I don't know what I was thinking, or why I did it. I cry every day for what I did, what I lost and what I can't have back. I wish so bad for us to try to work things out, but he just doesn't seem to want to. He says he wants to "heal alone" but when i stopped by his house to give him back a shirt early in the morning, a female answered the door. A friend, yes, but how is he "healing alone?" I wish I could fix things. Does anyone have any advice what I can tell him, what I can say to encourage him to work on our relationship, and not head for the hills? I can't MAKE HIM, I know, but I'm sorry, and I wish I could just delete my "friend" out of my life and persue the person I love. Please help me. I do believe that relationships can work after something like this, it was a one time thing, and I regret it. Why does he hate me, and how can I/we fix it... Thank you guys.

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