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Relationship Health Message Board

Relationship Health Board Index

i've used this site for health-related issues, but i saw this relationship tab and decided to make a post here, as i don't want to burden my friends any further with my relationship babble, haha.....

my now ex-boyfriend and i started fooling around 3 years ago. i always wanted something more, he always said he had baggage with his ex-gf. we finally started dating over a year ago, and dated very happily for over 9 months. we never argued about anything, and we compliment each other very well- i felt there was a genuine understanding betweeen us as people. in fact, when we would drink together, HE would be the one to ask things like "would you take your husband's last name? would you mind if your first kid's name was [blah]?" we never said "i love you" to each other, and i figured that because it was real, we didn't need to say it. wishful thinking, i guess??

in november, he broke up with me, claiming that he didn't want to waste my time anymore, as he couldn't see himeself marrying me. we still remained good friends, though i was a wreck about it. we even continued to be intimate on occasion, while intoxicated usually. the following months, he started fooling around with a neighbor upstairs, who was known for her promiscuity. and my ex-bf is know for having very high standards, so no one knows what the heck he was thinking! and yet, he would still try and be with me intimately, though he never kissed me. i felt very used and told him, and he claimed it wasn't true.

however, in late april, there were a few nites in a row when i know he was not intoxicated, and yet he came to my room just to cuddle, and when i asked him what he was doing, he said he didn't know. a friend asked him about this behavior, and he said he was drunk an is "so" over me.

i've moved back home from school, and he came to my graduation party. nothing happened, but he did give me a gift- a beautiful necklace. i had a friend suggest that if he was "so" over me, he wouldn't have given me jewelry.

the latter friend dealt with an uncannily similar situation and the person on the "mean" end eventually came back, and said they were acting like that because they loved my friend so much and just needed to grow up.... can anyone else relate?? is he really over me, or is he trying to deal with his own short-comings and confusions??? my gut is telling me the latter, but i'd appreciate any input. and if i don't get any, at least i had a place to write down some feelings.... :angel:

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