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I'm really sorry to hear that Emma. I remember you from before, when I was Snails, and all the problems you had with your sick ex. You deserve some luck when it comes to love! But with this guy, I think you might be better off just ruling him out in your mind. But before that, it might be worth just asking him flat out if he has a girlfriend so you can get the whole story. He might not really have one after all if your information is second hand, but if he does, definitely move on, because you don't need that drama and you deserve a man all to yourself. But I would definitely talk to him...the boy I've been seeing lately is an old friend, we've been friends for like 10 years, and when I first talked to him again recently, he was under the impression that I was ENGAGED, which has never been remotely true. I guess my mom and his mom were gossiping and things got blown out of proportion, so he was operating under faulty assumptions and information and wouldn't have pursued me as more than a friend if I hadn't told him not to believe the lies. Anyway, don't be afraid to stay single and hold out for a great guy all for yourself if this one turns out to be already involved with another woman. Good luck:wave:
Great advice from Goody and Sophia. Definitely try to find out from him what his relationship status is, even if you have to be patient and bring it up subtly in casual conversation. Asking him flat out would be scary and unnecessarily awkward, I think.

As for what Chieftain said, I think that is very interesting, though I hope he doesn't really feel like he has to settle for being second best or the man on the side, because everyone deserves better than that. A lot of times it seems that everyone thinks it is horrible to get involved with anyone who has another person in their life, but it happens all the time. One of the reasons I am falling so much for the guy I like now is because he has been patient while I had other boyfriends, respecting those relationships if I told him they were serious, but also making it clear that he still liked me and would be interested in the future. In fact, that is the same guy that was under the impression that even though I am single and have never been engaged, I was somehow marrying some mystery guy. If he had never gotten up the guts to ask me if I was really engaged, he would still be under that stupid ludicrous impression and wouldn't have pursued me, and we wouldn't be involved together happily right now. So I definitely agree with Sophia that you need to find out for sure what the deal is from him firsthand, hopefully soon before you get even more emotionally invested in him.

I think that while it is never cool to get involved with someone who is already in an exclusive relationship, you cannot always help who you fall for, and people stop dating one person because they like someone else better ALL THE TIME. So unless he is serious about a girlfriend or married, it doesn't necessarily mean that nothing can ever happen as long as you are honest with everyone involved. I admire you for steering clear of any guy with a girlfriend, as that is very respectable and honest as well as just being smart and saving yourself a lot of unnecessary pain and drama.





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