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Okay, I've posted here before about my boyfriend and I. I know pretty much everyone told me to leave him...and I know you all probably think I'm stupid for not doing it. I feel weird posting here for advice, but I really need other peoples perspectives on things going on, so please bear with me and try to ignore my other post, for the time being. =/

My boyfriend and I used to hang out with his friends quite often. In the beginning of our relationship, I pretty much got along with them all, but as time went on, things happened, and we all didn't really like eachother very much. So I wasn't really invited to hang out anymore, which sucked, because my boyfriend would be with his friends a lot while I sat at home. However, there was one friend that was really cool, and was actually nice to me. He'd invite me places (with my boyfriend, of course) but he treated me like a person and not an annoying nag of a girlfriend, like his other friends did. My boyfriend and I would hang out a lot with this one friend last summer. I became friends with his friend, more or less. It was still sort of weird because he was my 'boyfriends friend,' but we were friendly enough.

Then my boyfriend got a job (last summer) and he'd be gone a lot. One day I was so bored, and I called my boyfriends friend (and mine, sorta?) to hang out. He came over, and it was fine, and we had fun. So he kept coming over the next few days. Whenever one of us was bored, we'd call the other one. It was stricly platonic, there's nothing there at all, and my boyfriend even said he didn't care because he trusted both of us, and it wasn't just some random guy, but his friend. He's told me that many times whenever we'd talk about it, how this one friend is the only one he wouldn't mind if he's with me alone. It felt good to be trusted and to finally have someone to hang out with sometimes, when my boyfriend wasn't around. (My one friend goes to college far away, and when she's home, works literally almost every day. So during the year, I'm totally alone when my boyfriend is out..which is a lot, lately)

Well, then that friend got into trouble and was put away for quite a few months. I was back to the friends that didn't like me, and treated me like I wasn't worth the time of day, so I was left out. I don't expectmy boyfriends friends to love me, but the don't have to completely exclude me, either. Anyway, it sucked. But within the past 2 weeks, the friend came back. He was really nice to me still (but like I said, in a friend type of way) and we've been hanging out. I didn't think twice about it, because my boyfriend has told me he trusted us, many times.

My boyfriend works 2 jobs, and he's gone a LOT. He'll be gone from 8 in the morning until like 11 or 12 at night (and usually longer, because when he gets off of us second job, he'll usually go drink with his friends or something) I'm alone ALL the time. It's lonely, and it's been driving me insane. My boyfriend has also been acting like it's such a chore to hang out with me, because I'm annoying and I complain too much, etc..so to have someone actually want to hang around me is nice. It's just nice to have someone to do stuff with while my boyfriend is gone, because I've been going insane sitting at home all day doing nothing with no one.

But yesterday my boyfriend saw that his friend was over again, and when my boyfriend and I went to buy cigarettes alone, he told me he didn't want me to hang out with his friend alone anymore. I said I wouldn't if he didn't want me to, but ever since he told me, I've felt like crap. I don't understand why, all of the sudden, he has a problem with it. He had no problem with it when it was happening last summer, and nothing has happened inbetween that time to make him not trust me. But now, I'm stranded without someone to hang out with again. I don't think he cares that I sit home alone all day while he's at work/drinking with his friends.

In his defense, I've asked him to please not hang out with girls, and him hanging out with a girl alone would upset me a LOT. But in my defense, he's cheated in the past, I haven't...and if he and my friend were hanging out, I'd have no problem with it, as I trust both people involved and I know nothing would happen. This is what he's said before, too. (By the way, I'm not saying because he cheated, there's a double standard and I can hang out with tons of guys...I'm just saying, I have reason to be worried..I've never given him a reason)

He's also told me (about a month ago) I can have guy friends, he doesn't care because he trusts me. But all of the sudden it's a problem, and I feel like a huge hypocrite getting upset about it and having him reconsider. But I just feel like he doesn't want me to spend more time with his friend than he does. It feels like he wants me to be lonely, or something. I don't know...I don't feel like it's about him being uncomfortable about it. And he does so many things I'm uncomfortable with, I almost resent that he's asking this of me, because I ask things of him..and he hardly ever respects it. He'll say I'm controlling, and usually do it anyway.

He will hardly talk about anything anymore. I'm almost afraid to bring this up because I don't want to make him mad, and have him say that he's just going to go hang out with girls then. If it was my friend, I honestly wouldn't care..it's just random girls I'm worried about.

That's why I need opinions, please...do I have a right to be upset, or am I being a horrible hypocrite? If it was any other guy, I wouldn't mind cutting him off, but I don't understand why suddenly it's a problem with this one friend. I know this seems extremely stupid and pety, but I've been sitting home alone for so many months now, it was such a nice break to finally get to hang out with someone. If I'm wrong, please feel free to tell me, and I won't even bring it up to him.





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