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Relationship Health Message Board

Relationship Health Board Index

I think you need to drop the affair. You say you love your wife, love your kids, need them, are responsible. Act like it. Love and affection are missing from your marriage, eh? Work towards getting it back. Talk to your wife about what you feel is missing, get counseling if necessary, take a vacation just the two of you.

Who's to say you dump your family, get a divorce and end up with this woman, that the love and affection won't fade away there, too? Then what do you have?

I also can't help but wonder about this other woman. If she knows you're married with kids to a good mother and wife, what does that tell you? If she's okay with having a part in breaking up a marriage, freaking out your kids, does this sound like a woman you'd want any sort of commitment with?

What if the shoe were on the other foot, and your wife found somebody she had a crush on in middle school and you were just in the dark about this?

I think you're jumping and gun and thinking with the wrong head. You need to make every effort to fix what's wrong with your marriage -- which sounds like a very easy fix, BTW, if it's just feelings of love and affection has died out...I think it happens in every marriage at one time or another -- before you go off and find someone else.

I don't know, tho. The more I think about this, I don't think your wife deserves you at all. Maybe you should just end it with your wife, so she has the opportunity to still find someone who won't do this to her and your kids have a real man to look up to and learn from.

Like other posters, I, too, have very little tolerance for cheaters. Sorry if my post is harsh, but it's about as nice as I can make it.

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