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well I had a BF like this and I would always be on him telling him that compliments are free, it doesn't cost you anything, blah blah blah. I said I think we should make a point to compliment each other daily about something.....anything.....he never would. Turned out he had NPD, narcissistic personality disorder, and once I read up on that it made sense.
I hope that's not the case with your guy.
I once had a friend like that - Maybe more like an aquaintance. People would compliment her on her looks all the time. She really was beautiful, but she never noticed when anyone around her got a new outfit, hairstyle, nothing. She couldn't, for some reason, acknowledge anything attractive in anyone else. The world of beauty only revolved around her. :D

Maybe some people are just too "in to" themselves to notice or compliment others. I bet if you stopped complimenting your bf on his looks though, he'd notice real quick.:rolleyes: Just a thought.
I am the living example of an INTP described by Veronica Mars earlier. I will testify to the accuracy of what she described in her post. If your BF is an INTP, that would explain a lot.

Not only do I rarely compliment others, I don't take compliments well somethimes and I never need it.

In things that I'm sure about, I am so confident that it is down right errogant at times. This annoys my wife to no end.:blob_fire :D

The only doubt I see here is that I don't spend much time in front of the mirror. Anyway, I don't think this should come between you unless he starts to nit pick at you too.
[QUOTE=minijumbofly]I am the living example of an INTP described by Veronica Mars earlier. I will testify to the accuracy of what she described in her post. If your BF is an INTP, that would explain a lot.

Not only do I rarely compliment others, I don't take compliments well somethimes and I never need it.

In things that I'm sure about, I am so confident that it is down right errogant at times. This annoys my wife to no end.:blob_fire :D

The only doubt I see here is that I don't spend much time in front of the mirror. Anyway, I don't think this should come between you unless he starts to nit pick at you too.[/QUOTE]

Hey, I bet we'd get along! I had to laugh when you said that you don't need ego stroking but are nonetheless VERY confident about the things you feel good at...that sounds just like my boyfriend! In general he's really laidback and low maintenance, but he gets downright cocky when he's golfing, making sure I know exactly how good it is when he hits an especially good shot. And he doesn't take compliments well at all, like you're supposed to, by just saying thank you. But like you said, some people don't need compliments from others, so it makes sense that they aren't inclined to give them out. It is true too what Chieftan said that it's not particularly appealing when people seem to really want or need compliments.

Anyway, some people really don't place a lot of importance on complimenting others, but it doesn't necessarily mean that they care any less than people who do compliment you a lot. If anything, I am suspicious of people who compliment me all the time, other than my mom :). But with my boyfriend, it doesn't really bother me that he doesn't spend a lot of time telling me I look good or complimenting my intellect, because I am pretty confident about those things and anyway, other people compliment me. I know that he likes these things about me anyway without him having to say it, he makes it obvious how he feels.

HOWEVER, some people are just not comfortable being in a relationship with someone unless they get a lot of verbal feedback. If you are one of those people and your guy is by nature not a very verbally expressive person, then this might continue to bother you. My best advice is not to worry and to remember that if he did not really like you and feel strongly about you, he wouldn't be your boyfriend and treat you well. And talk is cheap! There are plenty of men out there who will sweet talk you like crazy but not mean any of it or else be out saying the same things to a lot of other women. In my opinion as long as you love each other and he treats you lovingly, there's no reason to focus on what he doesn't do. Hopefully it will all work out well for you...good luck.
Your bf sounds alot like me when my boyfriend and I started going out.I rarely ever complimented him but he always complimented me. I didn't because I usually keep my thoughts to myself, maybe he's just like me. The weird thing is that I've never had issues complimenting anyone else not even strangers. Sometimes we would go out and I really thought he looked nice but I would just keep it to myself, and I honestly didn't even THINK it was important to him.

Eventually he brought it up and was really upset about it and told me he wished I would compliment him more and asked me why I didn't. When he told me he wished I would compliment him more it made me feel REALLY pressured, and then I ended up analyzing him from head to toe trying to find things to compliment him which made me feel like if I was giving him a fake compliment ( I don't know if that makes sense)...It also made me feel really bad to think back on all those times that I thought he looked nice and never said anything about it. I know I would feel bad if I spent time getting ready for him and he didn't say anything about it.

Anyways I think you should bring this up to him and maybe suggest nicely that you'd want him to compliment you more.
LOL - interesting comments................

Well - I say you have every right to feel the way you do.
Boyfriends or Husbands - SHOULD compliments to their love ones.
Even when we feel or look crappy, when you are in love with someone it's not what's on the outside that they love but what's inside (haven't we all heard that before?)
100 Men can tell me I'm beautiful, but if it's not coming from my husband those 100 men who can tell me how beautiful I am means nothing, I wanna hear it from my husband............

Ofter gaining 40 ugly pounds and feeling soooooo like crap, my husband STILL continues to tell me how beautiful and awesome I look, I may not feel it but just the fact that he's telling me boosts my ego alittle.............

If you haven't heard it in over a year, 6 months, 3 months, or a month that he loves you and you are beautiful or that maybe TODAY you looked good, you are never going to hear it and that is something you want to consider what is important to YOU..........:cool:





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