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Relationship Health Message Board

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[QUOTE=GypsyArcher]Tedious? What is so bad about having all of these guys want to spend time with you? I understand that it might make you feel a little guilty because they used to be with your friends, but people can't help who they're attracted to. Don't feel bad because these guys like you or else just want to have the pleasure of your company. That should put a little bounce in your step.

You're right, people can't help who they're attracted to, but that doesn't mean they have to take measures to see sparks fly. Self control would apply here, perhaps? Just because you're attracted to them doesn't mean they'd make very good boyfriends - just ask your friends, who are unaware of that fact that you're still hanging out with their hateful formers. Although it's good to hear that things worked out for you, you do realize you're one of those rare cases that's actually found success through this? I'm not trying to be a jerk, but just curious: how many bridges have you burnt in the past to finally find this guy? It would be quite astonishing if you said zero. But then again, is the number relevant when it comes to finding love? In your case I'm guessing no. Maybe I'm naive, but I don't believe that just because it worked out for you, Gypsy, that this should be suggested a good means of sparking off new relationships.

Now to answer your question: what's so bad about having all these young bucks wanting to spend time with you is their ex-girlfriends with whom you are still friends. Betrayal. Yes, that's about the only word that comes into mind, even if it's harmless. I find it doubtful that these guys are only looking to "hang out." You know what they want from you - why go along with it?

If they weren't good enough for your friends, what makes you think they'd be good enough for you? Why bother when you know it's not cool? With that, maybe you should question yourself about how good of friends these girls are to you. Are they worth going behind their backs to do something you know they probably won't approve of? If you cherish a drop of their friendship, tell their stupid lingering ex-boyfriends who wants to "hang" to piss off. Think about it, really. Even if you'd be okay with the idea that your friends were keeping in touch with your ex, does it make it okay for you in return? It seems very unethical to me, and an easy way to burn a lot of bridges. In the end, is it all worth it? That's what you need to ask yourself: is one potential love worth ten friendships?

Feel free to disagree with me. It's early, and I could've had my head up my *** this entire time, which I have an apparent propensity to enjoy doing a lot lately ;)

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