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Relationship Health Message Board


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Just wanted to share my two cents here...

My ex boyfriend...lied to me about something, that I found on the computer...my computer I may add. My discovery was kind of an accident, I clicked the wrong history link and it opened to one of his online accounts. When I asked him about it, he freaked on me denied it all (I mean I was looking at it and he was on the phone yelling crazy things at me) and kept denying it. Then you bet I did some real searching and found way more than what I had bargained for. He still denied everything. Lied lied lied...and it seemed almost easy for him to do it. Did he feel bad in the end...yes, did he have regrets, yes, did he love me, I think so, but sometimes now wonder. Anyway the thing is right from the first time I asked him, I just wanted him to admit it, own it and tell me, so I would know it was nothing, or didn't mean anything or whatever, I was dying inside for him to fix this. And he just flat out freaked on me and kept lying. In the end I emailed him some of what I came across, and finally he stopped lying. But he never truly ever owned it. It came back to my past behavior, every other relationship issue and what he assumed was a lack of trust. To be honest there was a small window of opportunity where he could have done something to help, to make it better for us, but once that passed, there was no going back. You may be in the same boat. I'm not passing judgment on you, just sharing here. The thing is he can't do a thing now. No matter what he does or says I see him differently and us differently. He can't do anything and I can't change the way I feel. We all make mistakes and screw up. Sometimes the consequences are huge. I hope your girlfriend comes around for you. But I can understand her feelings.





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