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Well, this year has been a long 1.
Me (23) and my man (20) worked together for about a year, we both were in serious reasonships...so we never got together, but we flirted and there was definite chemistry. Evenually we seperated from our partners and started dating back in may 05. Everything was going great! we were great friends, great lovers..what more could you ask for?
3 Weeks into dating...bam! I'm pregnant!
It was really hard for me to tell him because i was afriad he would tell me to "get rid of it", and that would haven't broken my heart. This guy means more to me thn anyone...and i really wanted to share this beautiful child with him. He was 19 at the time....just out of highschool, still living with his parents...no bills, no responsibilities. See i have been on my own for a few years, and am a responsible adult. I should've been more smart, but my heart took over my body at this point. After a couple weeks things between us started to get very odd, less and less he would call, say i love you, ask me how i was feeling, wanting to spend time together...for the longest time i coudn't figure it out, and became very bitter and sad and angry. We broke in sept. last year, because i had finially had enough...he wasn't saving for our baby, he would ignore me if he saw me in public....I don't know..I admit there were times i was an irrashional b****. But, my hormornes were skyrocketed and all i needed was his arms around me, telling me everything would be ok, and we'd be together. We had been seperated for awhile, weeks would go by and no word. Not even i would call him, i just figured it was over. He'd call, want to "work things out"...we'd hang out, have sex....argue. Then weeks would go by again...same thing over and over for my whole entire pregnancy. I know what your thinking. "Why did you keep going back to him"...well, i loved him that much i guess, that i would put myself through all that pain and torture week after week, just to have him close to me for a short time.
He would bring things up like "lets move in together"...and then take it back a week later, saying i have been too rude to him, he can't stand it!.
When i was giving birth to my baby in march I let him know i was there and that i was in labor.....he didn't come....he said he was waiting for me to "tell" him to get there. Finially after my son was born he came, he sat there with our newborn wrapped in his arms for 5 or 6 hours, never said a word or talked to me or my family. It was the hardest time in my life....Watching the man i love hold the child we created together and say nothing to me.
After i came home from the hospital, things seemed differnt, he was more warm and wanted to talk about things, at this point i had given up all hope and refused him. He told me something that really bothered me. A week after we found out we were having a baby my bestfriend (at the time), told him that i had cheated on him and that the baby maynot/most likely isn't his. He kept this from me for 9 months...Could that explain his actions and why he was soo cold and distant, thinking that this baby wasn't his? We have since moved intogether and are doing really well, but i still wonder why all the drama. Why didn't he just tell me what he had heard, obviously it wasn't true. I know he is a very quiet person and that scares me that he could keep something that huge from me. I love him so much and want nothing more than to be his forever, be a family. But we still have our days where hes worried i am off with someoneelse. Then i find texts and calls form girls.. and i get upset and he leaves...could he be worried about me, because he has a guilty conscience? Please help me understand the male brain, it is so utterly confusing.
[QUOTE=Rysmamma].....Could that explain his actions and why he was soo cold and distant, thinking that this baby wasn't his?....could he be worried about me, because he has a guilty conscience? ....[/QUOTE]

OMG ! Do [U]whatever it takes[/U] to prove to him that this is his baby. While that baby is yours for sure, to him it's either of his own blood [B]OR[/B] that of a competitors. And boy O boy, is it ever repulsive for guys to just think of their lover being with another man, let alone carrying someone else's baby.

...Sigh...at 20 and with his background, I don't think he has any idea what he's up against. I think he's feeling more confused than any other thing right now, so don't expect much in the way of love and affection. I hope you'll be able to convince him that the child is his for sure. The only chance you have would be for his father instinct to kick in. Otherwise.......very sorry.....

Good Luck





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