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Relationship Health Message Board


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Well i've read all the posts, quite a lot of reading there, so good luck with your tests today.

Firstly, from your original post, i gather you aren't English and your background is from another culture altogether. I'd say this is why your mother has been crying so much and they are likely worried that you have shamed the family and think you will never find a good husband etc etc. I can understand your families reaction totally as both my parents were born in Europe and i had a very strict upbringing. If i had ended up in your situation at your age, they would have been totally angry with me and i'd not be allowed out of their sight and they would be thinking i deserved all i got for doing something i knew i was not allowed to do. It's basically a cultural thing and something a lot of other more liberated cultures wouldn't understand. It's a difficult way to grow up too b/c you can't be honest and upfront with your parents which leads to the telling of lies and dishonest behaviour. If your parents had not been so strict and had allowed some independance you wouldn't have had to sneak around as you did. You would have likely invited this guy into your house to meet your parents and he would have refused and you would have soon realised something was up.

I'd not be giving this guy any details or scaring him with any information. Simply let the police do what they have to do. Keep all your clothing and the blanket in a sealed plastic bag. Who knows, the police might be able to get valuable DNA off it. Keep his emails and txt's as possible evidence too.

I don't believe his story of having to escape Australia due to kissing another woman. Australia is a very big place, if he was in trouble he could have moved interstate. I don't believe this man is Australian either b/c men here don't get into trouble for kissing another woman, forcing them to flee the country altogether. I'd say he immigrated to Australia from another country and ended up in trouble with the law and knew he would get deported to his original place of birth or would have served a jail term. There are people who migrated to other countries, change their name, have two passports running and escape when things get a bit diffiuclt. This leads me to ask whether this guy is truly who he says he is, meaning his name and basic identity. He could easily be using a bogus name so that when he ends up in trouble he uses his passport with his real name to escape.

Perhaps his intention was not necessarily to drug you for sex alone but to take photos to sell to somebody for the internet. Someone of his type would be used to lying and would be a real smooth talker. Don't get too upset with yourself, women of all ages, young and old have fallen for the smooth and supposedly genuine guys, only to find out they have been had. Some guys like this prey on women for sex others prey on women for money. In your case, the next guy who appears interested in you,make him meet your parents first. Parents are often good at sorting out guys who don't have honourable intentions.





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