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I suppose the thread title captures it all in a nutshell, but I could really do with some outside perspective on this: About six months ago my sister started to behave oddly towards me in drink, and when I say 'oddly' I mean abusively really, always ready to pick a fight to the point where I felt like I was walking on eggshells in her company every time she had a drink in her hand (which was almost every time I saw her)

I know the obvious advice would be to stay out of her way when she's drink taken, but that's really not as easy as it sounds. We dont live anywhere near eachother, we live on opposite ends of the city, and would only see eachother every week or two on occasions that would be in someway social and there'd inevitably be drink involved. I dont know if you people can relate, I know that different cultures had different drinking habits, but I'm from Dublin, Ireland, and drinking is a BIG part of the social culture here. Added to that the fact that she works in the hospitality trade, which means she finishes every night with a couple of glasses of wine..

It got so bad that about two months ago I told her I reckoned we needed some time apart because I couldnt listen to anymore drunken abuse, we didnt speak for a good few weeks after that. We got back talking in the last few weeks and sure enough the drunken abuse continued. I strongly suspect there is some underlying resentment involved, though she denies this. She also denies that she is being abusive at all, which is pure crazy, believe me!!!

It all came to a head last night when she called over to my house. Two seperate times I had to diffuse a row, entirely of her making, and the third time she started her bulls**t I'd just had enough and said (as she was pushing to talk about something personal in my relationship with my boyfriend) "I dont want to talk about that, and that is my right; you should respect that". I made sure to use a gentle non-argumentitive tone (because I know how she is!) but she just flew into a ridiculous unreasoanable rage and ran out the door. I'd already had to gently talk her out of running out the door an hour earlier for an equally ridiculous reason.

At this point I've just decided I've had enough. I dont want to talk to her and I dont want to see her, which is especially sad and hard at this time of the year. But what else can I do? Her drinking is affecting her personal relationships. She texted me today and I told her this. She was only telling me last night about a row (all of her own making, as she admitted) with her boyfriend which happened only the night before. I pointed this out to her today in text, but the truth is a bitter pill for her and she is refusing to swallow it.

I dont really know what I'm asking here, I've already decided what's best for me. I need her out of my life, at least till she's come to her senses. I think it's pretty clear she's got a drink problem. I told her today in text that an adverse affect on personal relationships is pretty high on the indicator list of a drinking problem, but as I said, she's finding this a bitter pill, and it's sticking in her throat (pity it wont go down as easy as the wine)

The biggest element of this that is worrying to me is that I have a 12 year old son. I have already decided that there's no way I'm removing myself from the firing line only to put him in it, so the only single condition of her seeing him is going to be that she's sober when she takes him and consumes no alcohol whatever while she has him. That's non-debatable for me, but I am worried that she may either lie and drink on the sly while she has him/or accuse me of trying to control her actions and that that may end up in her not seeing her nephew. I really dont want this issue between us to affect my sons relationship with his aunt, but I can see that coming down the line.

I'd VERY much appreciate if anyone has had similar problems with a family members drinking sharing that experience with me. I had an alcoholic ex, but just left his arse, but with your own sister it's not so easy.

I apologise for the legnth of this post. I have tried to contain myself here as I could have ranted on all day, lol. Thank you all for listening.:confused: :confused: :confused:





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