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Relationship Health Message Board

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Dec 6, 2006
I guess writing this will be a kind of therapy for me.
I am a bit on edge right now due to present circumstances.
I am writing here for the first time so forgive me if the same/similar thing has been written before.
Please give me some advice if you can. I really don't know what to do.
I have a brother who is in his early 30s and is scaring me. He is married with a 2 year old child. His relationship with his wife, brothers, and sisters is extremely strained. He quickly snaps at anyone with a contrary opinion to his own. Any criticism is met with an example of something that the criticiser did/or does wrong. He is someone that we would not go near if he wasn't famiily. His wife often asks for help in dealing with him. He feels everyone else is at fault in every argument.
It all started about three years ago.
He was having a great deal of trouble at [U]work...[/U] The following are just the things that he told me.
1)Accused coworkers of keeping meeting schedules from him thus getting him in trouble when he didn't show up.
2)Believed that secretaries/office staff were talking about him so left recording device under photocopier to 'catch' them. He made a big display of fetching it about an hour later so that they would know they had been 'caught'. It turned out that they were talking about work related matters 'that time'. But he 'knows' they were often talking about him.
3) Told me that people at work were trying to poison him. He was feeling ill and believed that they were putting something into his drinks. He set up a sting operation with a bottle of juice that he put on his desk. He couldn't catch anyone.
Eventually he became too sick to work. He said he felt dizzy and couldn't concentrate. This started a parade of trips to [U]hospitals.[/U]
For some reason he decided that he was b12 deficient.
1)He went to his usual hospital for blood tests. The tests came back normal. He was upset with the doctor and believes that the doctor doctored the results.
2) He went to another hospital with the hopes that the result will be to his liking. He discussed the possibility of a lawsuit against the first doctor.
The results were the same.
3) This set off frantic internet searches about his symptoms and he is presently taking over the counter b12 supplements and other vitamins and minerals.
4) When he first started taking the supplements he said, 'I haven't felt this good in years.' The good feeling subsided and he was looking for new things to be tested for.
He started talking to me about [U]other possible causes[/U]for his problem.
1)mentioned that he doesn't trust his wife's family and now that he's thinking about it, he first started feeling ill right after a trip to their hometown.
2)mentioned that he doesn't totally trust his wife. told me that when he saw his wife in the kitchen and when he asked her what she was doing she didn't answer. He pressed it and she got angry telling him that she doesn't have to account for everything she does. He feels that she was doing something in the fridge.
[U]relationship with his wife[/U]
1)I have witnessed the way he gets when she gets a call on her cellphone. He stops whatever he's doing and actually tries to join in on the conversation.
2)He lost his temper when a Fedex delivery guy called for directions to the house(which is hard to find) and she explained it to him which took about three minutes. She should have said, 'if you have the address then you can find it'. That's all she should have said to him.
3)Checks her cellphone for messages/calls to/from men when she is sleeping.
The most recent event...(this is the real reason I'm writing this. It's absolutely crazy and I'm in shock)
We went out to a restaurant for something to eat. We were into the meal when he notices something white in his drink. He dumped it out and got a new one. Soon after that a couple friends of mine happened to come into the restaurant so I asked them to join us. Everything seemed okay but...
when we were leaving he said, 'somebody tried to poison me.' I just ignored it but the next day things got strange. He had a headache.
These message came to my cellphone...
Message 1:
Subject: None
Message: Are you proud of yourself?
Message 2:
Subject:Police Station
Messge: We need your statement.
I gave him a call and he said that he was just about to go to the police. He needs my statement. He then confirmed that I had indeed seen the white thing in his drink. I told him that I had. Then he asked me why I invited other people to the table immediately after found it? Is it so that the police would have to investigate more people and you can get off? WHAT? You can't be serious?, I asked. He got really upset and started yelling. I said I had to go and hung up.
The next day I got the following message...
(he said to Abel, "Come out into the field with me.")
his action was premeditated
How perverse can he get?
He disdains contrition: the twist in the man is coupled up with obduracy.
He is adamant in his sin.
"Where is your brother?" God asks
"What have you done?"
Where is your brother?
Cain's defiance, there is his self pity: "My punishment is more than I can bear."
Now you are cursed. The very earth you have defiled by your action is itself the
witness against you which you cannot silence. Your brother's blood cries from the ground ..."
Cain's punishment consists simply in the predicament he has brought
upon himself. He has let aggression loose in the world: is it surprising that God should say,
"You will be a fugitive and a wanderer in it"? What other world is there for him to go
into but a world he has already infected with his own illwill?
What else can he be but a wanderer and a fugitive, forever fearful
that he will be a victim of the illwill he has himself loosed abroad?
He knows it will boomerang; he knows it, and he fears it:
"My punishment is greater than I can bear."
"Those who take the sword shall perish by the sword." (Matt. 26:52)
The above bit of business scares me.

I called him again and told him that I WOULD NOT, DID NOT, and WOULD NEVER try to harm him in any way. He tried to get a confession out of me. He said that he knows I put the 'white thing' in there and the police are on their way. It was in there before my friends joined the table and he ALWAYS checks his drinks when they first come. There are no other options except that I tried to poison him.
It has been 48 hours and I haven't tried to contact him. I am on the fence about whether to completely cut off contact with him or try to help him. I fear that it would be very hard to help him but I would like to try. Any advice?

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