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Ok, this isn't about my boyfriend, he's a sweetheart, and we are very happy. This is actually about a bloke I have met recently and I REALLY need some advice from men and women about it. I want to be friends with him but I feel like he's playing hard-to-get which is a game I didn't think friends played! He's got a girlfriend by the way and he's very happy.

I have never had male friends. Ever. Men usually bore me; I am too into my girly things and refuse to pretend that I find football interesting.

I have met a bloke at work. In person, we have such great fun. He always comes up to talk to me, and he has said some pretty complimentary stuff (for a bloke, if you know what I mean). We laugh about how much we have so much in common, the conversation flows effortlessly.

The problem is mainly that in person he is very attentive and interested but as soon as we are apart it’s as if I don’t exist and I never hear from him. I keep in contact with all of my friends, even if we only share an interesting internet site through email every couple of days.

The last time we went for lunch he mentioned that he hates the cliques at work, and would love to see me more, to go for a coffee etc. I was chuffed at the thought of having a male friend. That may sound pretty pathetic but girls can be SO complicated, and PMT is a constant obstacle! A PMT-free friend sounds fabulous.

So today we were going to the same building, he texted me and asked me if I was going in, I said yes. He said he’d see me there and I said 'sounds great'. We both had the afternoon off so I thought we’d go for a coffee. He got out of his meeting at work and texted me saying he was happy to be out of the meeting and that all his hard work has been done and he can now relax. I told him where I was and waited for him to text me back, but got nothing. So I bit the bullet and asked him if he wanted to go for a coffee and all I got was a text back saying “Can’t, I have an errand to run”.

1) I felt like a fool waiting around for him, but as far as I was concerned we’d made plans. Why didn’t he just txt me and tell me he was leaving? I could have been waiting for ages!
2) An hour later he was on MSN so his errand can't have been that important!
3) I’m the kind of person that would put off an errand even for about half an hour so that I didn’t let someone down. Why didn’t he do the same? Is this the usual behaviour of a man? The only men I know have been ex boyfriends and they wouldn’t risk upsetting me because they would have to face my wrath :)

So. From your experience, are male friends crap and keeping in contact? Is it a male trait?

Why would a man be so lovely and communicative in person and then ignore you the rest of the time?

And also, do you really think that men and women can be friends? I don’t find this guy at all attractive, but I LOVE his company. I would like to be friends, and either he doesn’t want to be or this is a mans idea of a friendship!

Does anyone have any wise words?





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