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Relationship Health Message Board


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Hi. I'm in a tough situation. PLEASE HELP :confused: I think I fell out of love with my girlfriend. I'm 24, she's 26. We've been together for almost 2 years now and it's been really crazy. Tho' we get along just fine, I think that "spark" is flaming out. She's my first girlfriend, first real relationship, you name it. She's had other boyfriends before me, and from what I understand they were all pretty bad expriences. She's told me repeatedly that she loves me so much, and that she's never felt love for another person like this [I]ever[/I]. I'm partly to blame for this because I was caught up in the new game of love. Even tho' I told her I loved her, I question whether or not I really meant it because I now realize I have no clue what "love is." My older brother broke it down for me to understand it better. "You might love her, but are you [I]IN love with her?"[/I] Tho' I was in denial at the time, I told him "yes." I hesitated, and changed my thinking. I then told him "I don't know?" I think I'm just afraid of the thought of loosing something so familiar. What's funny tho' is that from the beginning, I've always felt something was missing in our relationship.

I'm so scared of hurting her because I've tried explaining this to her in the past and she didn't take it lightly; of course, who wouldn't.

........Meanwhile, during our 1st year together I was doing an internship for college. I was co-training an aerobics class for a group of women, and I think I fell in love with one of them (same age, 24). I don't think I ever believed in love at first sight, but I think it happened when I first saw her. To this day I try and kid myself saying "you were just lusting over her." But when we use to talk, I saw similar interest. Similar taste in music, humor, etc. My intuition tells me we were both attracted to one another, as so I was told. But I never pursued her because I was in a serious relationship already (so was she at the time, but not anymore). I kid you not, I THINK ABOUT THIS WOMAN EVERYDAY. I feel so rotten because I shouldn't be feeling like this. My lust or love should be for my current girlfriend. I haven't seen this woman in almost a year and I still wonder if she's taken, or even thinks about me.

I keep saying "I'm young, and you live once. But should I risk throwing away a good woman who cares for me, or should take a huge chance by getting in contact with this woman?" I feel my chances are gone since it's been so long since we've spoken. I don't know what to do anymore! PLEASE, GIVE ME SOME ADVICE! Thanks.





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