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Relationship Health Message Board

Relationship Health Board Index

It depends who you ask, and I'm sure you'll get a lot of different opinions here. There are some people who insist that guys can't possibly be "just friends" with girls, because there are going to be some romantic feelings there that can't be ignored. However, I'm of the opposite opinion, having had several very close friendships with guys that never went beyond the friendship level. I felt about them the same way I feel about any of my female friends. They were all more like brothers to me than anything.

I had a bf once who got jealous of a guy friend whom I'd been friends with for many, many years. He insisted that I end the friendship. I just didn't think that was fair, since my friend had been there for me through thick and thin, and I didn't know how long the relationship would last.

So, that's why I'm of the opinion that you should never demand that your current bf ditch any of his female friends with whom he has been friends for a really long time, long before you ever entered the picture. While the issue of her being an ex is somewhat shady, consider that there really ARE people out there who can actually still remain friends with an ex, because they realized the relationship was just better suited as a friendship rather than a romatic relationship. I do have one friend who was an ex bf of mine from 10 years or more ago. He is now married and his wife never liked me much, but I honestly just have no desire to ever get back together with that guy ever again. I feel more like he's an old college buddy than an ex bf.

So, while I get that there are some people out there who stay friends in the hopes that some day they'd get together or back together in the case of ex's, but I think there are more people out there such as myself who have had many close friendships with members of the opposite sex who were not even remotely close to being relationship material.

I don't know if any of this helps you, but that's my personal experience.

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